April 29, 2012

Working Mom Likes Work (Is that wrong?)

[Hello! I am currently on a coffee high right now and my precious daughter is napping. Double Score! I want to spend some time thinking about... something important.]

I constantly have people asking me if I'd prefer to stay at home with my baby instead of work. The truth is that I enjoy working. I enjoy time spent outside of the house.

It's not that I don't like spending time with my baby because I definitely do. I am just not one to stay cooped up inside each and everyday. I have always kept a very busy schedule. During high school and college, I participated in several activities at once... piano lessons, sports, meditation club, work, internships, class, etc. I am just used to multitasking (or at least I was). Having a baby was some type of enlightening experience for me. My only task is to care for and love my baby. Nothing more. Don't get me wrong, I am not saying that babies cause you to be cooped up in the house all day long, despite what it feels like. Babies can be taken anywhere you go--- out to eat, to the park, zoo, grocery store, etc. But they do require feedings and naps every couple hours. They do require entertaining, time, work, and energy.

People like to guilt trip me. They ask, "Don't you miss spending all day with your baby?" I respond bluntly, "Nope. I like the break. I also love my work and all the people I get to see." I have given up on explaining myself because it is pointless. Sometimes I just respond with a simple "No." I like to cause drama I guess. It doesn't really matter what I say though because I always end up feeling guilty for the rest of the day.

The two loves of my life <3
This is a really dumb topic when you hear my work schedule. I work part time. I only work 35 hours a week for one to two months at a time. Out of the whole year, I work maybe four months. In Miss A's life thus far, I have worked three out of her nine months of existence. I am very lucky to have so much time with her. I know this but when people hint at the fact that I'd rather work than be a stay at home mom, I feel insulted. I feel like I am a bad mother when really I am not. Working allows me to spend more quality time with Miss A rather than just being home with her all day. If I am with her all day, everyday I grow restless and the time spent with her isn't as exciting as the time I have with her after I get out of work. When I come home from work, I am very excited to see her and I smother her in hugs and kisses. I tell her how much I've genuinely missed her and then we get time to laugh and play. The weekends are more enjoyable because I get two whole days to be with her. Working makes me not take the time we have together for granted. Also, when I am at work she is never with a random babysitter. She is always with either her daddy or grandma. Working gives Miss A more quality time with other members of the family.

Granted, I am not working my "career" full time job yet, I know things will change. Maybe I won't like longer work hours and I'll feel like I don't get enough time with Miss A later. But for now... my time commitments balance out.

I don't like people making me feel bad about myself. Duh. And I don't like people telling me how to live my life. I have a million dollars in student loans to pay off. And I also have my own life to live as well as provide a good path to success for my daughter. I just want people to respect the way I choose to live my life. If it bothers you, get over it and live your own life please (and thank you).

It's funny because the people who complain have children and work themselves. Go figure.


1 comment:

  1. I think I explained to you via FB that I am personally glad my worked throughout my childhood. Women need to support each other's choices and worry about their own families.


Thanks for reading!
xx Monica xx

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