September 17, 2012

How to Take Your One Year Old to an Information Meeting

Step 1: Think about what you will be putting yourself through if you attend this information meeting with your one year old.
Step 2: Tell yourself that it is a bad idea. Say "NO" aloud. Don't be afraid to say it firmly.
Step 3: Call a babysitter.
Step 4: If you can't find a babysitter, remember that you made a life changing decision on becoming a parent and that decision has left you to make a million sacrifices. Don't go to the information meeting. It's not worth the pain and anxiety. Besides, you won't learn anything if you are chasing a one year old around anyways.

I'm so helpful, right?

We went to a Paws With A Cause information meeting tonight with Miss A. We did everything we could to prepare our daughter for this one hour meeting. AND, as I expected, it was still a failure.

To prep her for the meeting, we ensured she had a good, solid nap and a filling dinner right before we left. We brought toys, her favorite book and stuffed animal, a pacifier, and a water cup to occupy her. When we arrived she instantly screamed and tried to run away from us as we sat down at a table. Bill tried putting her on his lap and she screamed. I put her on my lap and gave her the pen to draw with but that only lasted about a minute. Then she wanted down. I put her down and she slammed her water cup on the table. Then she started playing peek a boo behind my chair and giggling. Then she was instantly bored again and started whining. I whispered to Bill, "GET HER OUT OF HERE!"

Step 5: If you failed to do Steps 1-4 and you decided to bring your one year old with you to a meeting, then make sure you have an escape route.

I was lucky enough to have my husband run out of the room with my daughter. They played outside in the grass for 45 minutes while I learned about fostering a Paws With A Cause assistance puppy. If anyone is interested in fostering and helping train an assistance dog, this program is pretty awesome. It is especially great for those who live around Wayland, Michigan because they will cover almost all the costs for raising the puppy. =) We might join this program in the near future. It depends on whether or not we figure out what kind of dog we want to adopt for ourselves.

So once again, the biggest lesson of today is this:

DO NOT BRING YOUR ONE YEAR OLD TO AN INFORMATION MEETING.

And if you still choose not to listen... know that the following symptoms and side effects may occur: anxiety, stress, regret, guilt, post traumatic stress disorder, embarrassment, evil glares, extreme awkwardness, depression, suicidal thoughts, and more.

This is likely how you will look after the meeting.

4 comments:

  1. I hope you're not really super bummed about this. You did what you could and I'm sure a lot of the people around were parents and therefore sympathetic to your struggles.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Nope, not really bummed. I expected the disaster. It's just stressful. I meant to write w humor =)

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    2. I though you were funny! I was just checking on you!

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Thanks for reading!
xx Monica xx

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