Mommy & Love

Should You Pierce Your Baby's Ears?

2012-02-24T19:10:00.000-05:00

Before I found out the sex of my baby, I hoped it would be a girl so I could pierce her ears. Trivial, yes... but I thought it looked so cute and pretty. I've always been thankful that my mom pierced my ears when I was 6 months old so I never considered any moral issues with baby ear piercings. Now that she is 7 months old already, I have grown more and more hesitant about actually doing it.

Pros/ DO IT!

It's Cute. Duh! [Pretty earrings to match pretty little outfits! :) ]
Chances are she will choose to get her ears' pierced later in life. Why not do it now and get it over with?
It is less painful for a baby because their ears are tBaby will forget about the pain quickly... an older child will remember this memory. I personally am happy to not have this memory, even though it's not that painful.
This is not an abnormal thing for a parent to do... people have been piercing their ears for thousands of years. It's not like you are piercing your baby's belly button!
It's socially acceptable to have ear piercings.
The internet causes so much room for dramatizing every and any issue you never considered to be an issue in the first place. Do what you want as a parent. I've never heard of a girl complaining and irate about their mother piercing their ears when they were a baby. Just saying!

Cons/ Wait...

You as a parent have to provide daily ear care to make sure it doesn't get infected. Baby can't take care of it. (Obviously)
Baby might pull on the earrings or get it snagged on something and rip it out.
Baby does not choose to get a hole in their ear. Violation of baby's body???
Baby could swallow the piercing.
Doctor might not like the idea... though you can ask. [I'll let you know at her 9 month check up.]
You could hold off the excitement until she is older, when she asks to have her ears pierced. It will be a special occasion for her.

Clearly I am pro baby ear piercings!
However, I need people to convince me that it is okay to do it. This is mainly because of my baby's paternal grandmother and maternal great-grandmother who are strongly opposed to the idea. My mom is PRO ear piercings... but that is because she did mine and my sisters at a very young age.

Let me know what you think. I'm looking forward to hearing your opinions!
xx Monica xx

Another Wave of Depression

2012-02-22T13:12:00.001-05:00

In order to keep my Facebook and Twitter free from being bogged down by negative posts, I will try to capture them all in one blog post here. I told myself before starting my blog that I would mainly post about positive things related to family life--- life with a baby. But let's face it. Family life.. or any part of life does not only consist of sunshine and rainbows. If there are ups, there are downs. And right now... I am down.

I'm feeling...
Trapped. My beautiful 7 month old baby makes me feel like I can't do anything, despite all my ranting and raving of how "Just because you have a baby, doesn't mean you can't do anything!" The absolute worst thing about parenting is that I have had to wake up to a crying baby everyday for the past 7 months. [That's a big FML]. In addition, my husband is at a job with a crappy schedule & he is forced to work a lot of overtime. This makes me feel like I'm going crazy, especially because I am home 24/7 without him and without a job myself.
Bored. I am stuck at home... I feel like I'm waiting for my life to end. Nothing exciting is happening. Baby milestones are exciting but they aren't exciting when you're withering away while your baby is blossoming.
Uninspired/Unmotivated. I can't find motivation to look for jobs. I wanted to apply for jobs outside of Michigan/outside of the country. Now I can't do that because I am stuck with a million dollars in student loans and Bill has a job that he does not (rightfully) want to leave yet. He said he will leave it, if I find a job that is higher pay. Also we have been looking for houses to rent in a town I absolutely do not want to live in. Everyone (including Bill) thinks we should look there and it's because of convenience of having a free babysitter nearby. My biggest reason for not wanting to move to this place is irrational and therefore ignored. I simply hate this town. Why? Just because of how I felt when living there. Too difficult to describe. I'm uninspired because I'm not accomplishing anything I wanted to do. My bigger goals were moving away/having an exciting career, but I shouldn't complain because I have the family I've wanted too. Handsome/loving/awesome husband & beautiful/healthy baby...
Worthless. I don't feel like I will find a job that even has decent pay. When I say decent, I mean $20,000 annually. I have way too many student loans to settle for something like that. I can find a job, trust me but you what that job is? Sales clerk jobs.... Other minimum wage jobs. For now, I work as a reader, grading standardized tests. If that was full time, it'd be great because the people are awesome. It's part time though so... yeah.. I must motivate myself to commit to a full-time job search. I graduated from Michigan State University over a year ago now! It's crazy how fast time flies.
Overwhelmed by Nothing. I can't keep my life organized anymore with a baby. It is difficult. I feel like I should be able to do everything and anything I want. For goodness sake I am a STAY AT HOME MOM right now. My only task is to take care of our baby. I feel overwhelmed though. I used to be able to effortlessly keep our apartment clean and keep up on laundry & the dishwasher. I don't know how to do that anymore and it bothers me because I need a clean, clutter-free space to live in.

I feel like I should be on depression medication but I really hate medicine... including birth control pills. I'm not good about remembering them. My only cure right now (which helps a bit) is coffee.

I'll be fine... I just need something unknown that's around the corner.
I have a career fair to attend tomorrow. That could help me. We will see.

Don't Do This... [Wordless Wednesday]

2012-02-15T10:46:00.003-05:00

Daddy's Work of Art: Peas in microwave for 27 seconds.

Honeymoon in Jamaica

2012-02-13T23:52:00.000-05:00

The honeymoon was Fan-Fricken-Fastic!! We spent 5 nights, 6 days in Ocho Rios Jamaica at the Sunset Jamaica Grande [All-Inclusive] Resort. It was so much fun. No problems MoN!

Some words to sum up our trip in paradise...

80+ Degrees. Sunshine. Appleton Rum. Unlimited Drinks-- Piña Colada, Strawberry Daquiry, Purple Rain, Jamaican Delight, Miami Vice & many more! Blue Mountain Jamaican Coffee. Jerk Chicken/Pork. Fancy Restaurants. Snorkeling. Rafting on Martha Brae. Ocean. Beach. Mountains. Dunn's River Falls. Red Stripe Beer. Local Flea Market. YeaH MoN!!

Please enjoy some pictures! ;)

VIEW FROM HOTEL ROOM

Some of the city of Ocho Rios

The lifeguards got these water coconuts down from the trees for us! :)

It has little taste but it's great for your heart!

OUR ROOM

Lovely Swan the Maid Made <3

Colorful Bedspread!

Bill's dresser drawers are pulled out... pet peeve! ;) Heading to fancy dining! <3

INSIDE HOTEL

1 of many bars (8 total?)

Eating in the large buffet dining area

Can't remember names of these fancy foods... but they were all DELICIOUS!

Handsome as always... xx Fancy Dining xx

OUTSIDE HOTEL/ ON RESORT PROPERTY

We swam in a school of fish like these when we snorkeled. It was so cool!

Gecko!! Or is it a lizard...

Starfish!

I never knew how much I disliked these creepy creatures!

OUTSIDE THE RESORT

At Turtle Park w/ Rowan... who always managed to find us.

Rowan showed us around for $2. He wanted $20 or $50... Nice/Funny guy tho!

Ocho Rios Post Office

We ventured into the local flea market... & never thought they'd let us leavet!!

This man carved our names into this wood carving we bought from him.


TONS OF SHOPS LIKE THIS!! All similar but neat.

DUNN'S RIVER FALLS

We climbed this 600ft waterfall & got soaked head to toe! FUN!

RAFTING ON MARTHA BRAE

30ft Raft-- I LOVE this picture! <3<3

Cotton Tree... HUGE TREE!

Ackee Tree-- This fruit is in their national dish, served w/saltfish.

Nice Captain. Beautiful Scenery & Water.

Bamboo!

African Tulip Tree

Ended the trip w/ a nice, cold Red Stripe beer before heading back to the resort. [1hr away.]


Tasty Tasty

ON OUR WAY HOME

Souvenirs for our AmeLiA~ Dress & Dolly <3

Bye Jamaica!

Little Island..

Hello CUBA! [pretty sure this is Cuba...]

Cuba... (sorry... glare...)

Some of the BEST pictures I've ever taken right here....!!!

Absolutely Amazing. Notice the ripples in the water below...

No I did not take enough sky pictures!! They are too pretty!

Ft Lauderdale, Florida coastline

Sunset in Florida.

THE END.

Now I have to get a job. Get a house. Then plan our next trip! <3

Are You Spoiling Your Kids ROTTEN?

2012-01-30T19:56:00.003-05:00

Picture from kidcrave.com

Of course, I have always wanted to give my kids the luxuries I didn't get as a child. I have plans on making really fun, "adventure" bedrooms. For a girl, I would love to create a castle over top of a princess bed. For the walls, we want to have either a lego or chalkboard wall! (Thank you Pinterest!) I want to have a mini dress-rack with dress up/costume clothes on it. For a boy, (if we don't have a boy, then for the girl!!) I want to make a bed into a tree house in their bedroom. I've seen awesome examples online and it would just be awesome!

Just because I want to give my children some cool things I didn't receive as a child DOES NOT mean I want to raise a spoiled child... Spoiled is one thing but spoiled BRAT is another, and often go hand in hand. Here are some definitions/information I found about spoiled children surfing the web.

Urban Dictionary: A kid who wants everything they see... and they cry and scream their heads off until they get it.

Wikipedia: A spoiled child (also called a spoiled brat) is a child that exhibits behavioral problems from overindulgence by his or her parents. Spoiled children may be described as "overindulged", "grandiose", "narcissistic" or "egocentric-regressed".

Wikipedia: In 1989, Bruce McIntosh coined the term the "spoiled child syndrome".^[1] The syndrome is characterized by "excessive, self-centered, and immature behavior". It includes lack of consideration for other people, recurrent temper tantrums, an inability to handle the delay of gratification, demands for having one's own way, obstructiveness, and manipulation.

Happiestbaby.com: Spoiling has consequences that go beyond the immediate trouble of managing an unruly, spoiled child. It sets up patterns that can last a lifetime.
“Probably one of the greatest disadvantages that spoiled children face is the fact that they have not learned to work for something that they really want,” Buttross tells WebMD. “There is no work ethic, no lesson to really strive for something.”
Since spoiled people get what they want through manipulation, they develop “a dysfunctional way of relating to people,” Karp says. “Those habits can take 10 years of therapy to break.”

Chabad.org: (Parent Testimony...result of spoiling) It is ridiculous how much money was spent on them (our children), and they did nothing to deserve it. But worse, they were completely unappreciative and even complained that they didn't like the colors or the accessories that came with some of their gifts. Not only didn't they bother saying thank-you, we were met with eye rolling and smirks.

The only thing positive(??) about spoiling your child that I found is this article, Why You Should Spoil Your Kids By Debbi Miller Gutierrez. It is HILARIOUS. She's obviously joking, stating we should...

Always pick up after them
Never say no
Give them whatever they want
Make no demands of them
Keep tight control of the money

Basically spoiling your child is bad (Duh!) but for some reason some of us parents still want to do it. Maybe they don't even know they are doing it??

Make sure your children do not take things in life for granted. Give them gifts and fun toys when they deserve it, not just because they are bored or begging for it at the store. You don't want to spoil your child because they won't be able to handle life's normal pitfalls. Spoiled children do not outgrow these behaviors because that is how they were raised. They are used to getting their way so they won't be able to succeed despite downfalls. They won't do well with other people because they are used to thinking, ME ME ME all the time.

I'm not saying to not have fun with your kids!! Obviously giving gifts is one of life's little joys. You want to see that huge glimmering smile filled with joy as your child receives a big shiny ball.. or a trampoline! But make sure they are thankful for these presents. You want to raise respectful, unselfish children... don't you?

Does anyone know any spoiled children? Do they play well with your children? I'd love your thoughts!

Losing My Grandma

2012-01-28T01:25:00.003-05:00

I thought delivering my baby was the worst pain I would ever experience. Then three weeks later on August 7, 2011 something even more painful happened. I lost my grandma to lung cancer. She was diagnosed with cancer 3-4 months prior, had one partially successful treatment, lots of hope and strength, then unsuccessful treatments/poor immune responses, and then her health rapidly declined until she passed away. It was the first time I lost someone so close so me and it literally broke a piece of my heart off. It still upsets me strongly, which is why I am reflecting about it almost 6 months later. I remember feeling shocked, sad, angry, then shocked again, devastated, hopelessly depressed, furious, confused, and every other emotion possible. I was so emotionally upset that I would have rather given birth dozens of times over again. The emotional pain was nothing in comparison to giving birth after all the drugs/pain relievers wore off. Just a couple days ago, I had another emotional breakdown while thinking about how I would never see my grandma again, at least in this lifetime. I started crying softly, trying to hold it in (which is a dumb thing to do...), then Bill noticed and it all came out in a big explosion. I was sobbing fiercely until I started thrusting my arms and kicking and just having a fit. There is absolutely nothing I can do about my grandma passing away. There is absolutely no way to change what has happened. That is a hard concept for me. I have never truly experienced this and I was especially angry because my grandma could have lived another 20 years or so. She was only 63.

I spent as much time as I could with my grandma during her last week of life. She had pneumonia and was bed rest in the hospital with failing cancer treatments. There are two memories that are really important to me that I would like to share. The first night I visited her, when things had gotten really bad, she gave me a big kiss on my forehead. I will never forget that moment. After that, the few things she said were hard to understand due to all the drugs. She was in a lot of pain. Then she slept a lot, hardly ate a thing until I watched her completely stop functioning. I watched her dwindle down from appearing really healthy to lifeless. It was the worst thing in the world. Second memory I would like to share. It actually really hurts me too because it is related to my baby, her great-grand daughter. She did not get a chance to visit Amelia in the hospital when she was born because of her condition. Amelia was 3 weeks old when my grandma passed away. She never had the chance to hold her or talk to her BUT she did flash one big smile in the hospital when I brought Amelia in to see her. I will never forget that smile because at that point she was not functioning well. She was sleeping a lot and I could hardly understand her. I definitely couldn't communicate with her well. I told her "Grandma, Amelia is here to see you." She scrambled to get the pictures I brought her earlier. I said, "No, Grandma she is right here." She looked up at her and then gave me a big smile. That is all the response I got from her but it was enough because she got to meet Amelia.

Only time can heal this kind of pain. Though, I have a feeling it will never go away.

Our New Bathroom Decor!

2012-01-22T18:17:00.002-05:00

For our wedding, we registered for a light pink, floral themed bathroom.
I asked Bill if he was okay with our bathroom looking like "an old lady's bathroom".
His response. "You are the decorator Monica."
At my second bridal shower, I received most of our bathroom set.
Here is the new look!

Simply Shabby Chic Bath Curtain!

Fancy Jewelry Stand & Mirror

White Toilet Seat Rug-- I needed this!

Sweet Shower Curtain Rings-- Bedazzled

Apple Blossom Scented Air Freshener

Cat Ring Holder :D [My fAvE]

First Attempt at Homemade Baby Food

2012-01-15T21:03:00.000-05:00

I made baby food tonight! AND it was somewhat successful! I have been dreaming about this day for several months now. I used our juicer to fill 5 Munchkin Fresh Food Freezer Cups with carrot mush! It was really messy... and I have decided I will never use our juicer to make baby food again. The juicer takes out all the pulp and wastes most of the vegetable. I should have made 10 jars of carrot puree but instead the juicer separated the carrot skin with the inner parts. From now on, I will just steam the vegetables and then put them in my blender.

What a mess!!!

This is the only part I used, the rest was dry carrot skin... :/

I LOVE THESE CONTAINERS! Microwave, Dishwasher, & Freezer Safe!

Milky Oatmeal Bath to Help Eczema

2012-01-04T22:27:00.000-05:00

Our baby wakes up some nights itching like crazy because of her eczema! Last night she woke up a good dozen times fiercely itching her scalp and eyes. I feel so bad for her. I'd rather have eczema than have her suffer with it! We are sure to lotion her entire body with Aveeno Daily Moisturizing Lotion, with is formulated with oatmeal and recommended by her pediatrician. It really makes her [and me!] feel soft and silky despite her rough patches of dry skin. When she is really itchy and red, we put Aquaphor Healing Ointment on her. I don't like this ointment as much because it is thicker and leaves her skin looking shiny/oily but since it helps, we use it.

I'm finding that keeping her free of dye/scented products AND applying lotion frequently does not help her completely. Though her eczema has significantly improved and her face is no long covered in red, rash-like patches, we cannot let her wail and toss around all night because of irritated skin. So, I finally broke down tonight and ran her a warm, oatmeal bath. Let me tell you what.. It made her skin softer and more moisturized than any product we have tried!

Simple, Mess Free Instructions for Milky Oatmeal Baths

Cut off the foot of a pantyhose.
Fill it with plain oatmeal and tie it off.
Draw warm bathwater while holding the oatmeal filled pantyhose underneath it. This will create a creamy, milky bath instead of having to bathe in actual oatmeal. [Great too, but messy!]
While baby is playing in the water, wash her with the oatmeal filled pantyhose. I ran it over her entire body, including hair.
After washing, leave it in the bottom of the tub.

It leaves the skin very, very soft and soothed while reducing itching and inflammation.

You can see her Eczema a little on her belly :( Not TOO bad though

Monica's Top 5 Posts of 2011

2011-12-30T23:59:00.000-05:00

I created this blog in May 2011. I was thrilled about being pregnant and could not wait any longer to share my feelings and excitement with who ever would listen. Here are my most read posts of the year. I look forward to bettering my blog and writing more of my experiences with family and motherhood as the year starts anew. Thanks for reading! I appreciate my followers and commenters always.

HAPPY 2012 EVERYONE!

10 Things I Love About Being A Mommy
Baby smiles...milestones... and more!

10 Things I Love About Pregnancy
Fetal movements... Hearing heartbeat... and more!

10 Things I Hate About Pregnancy
Emotions... Nausea... Yeah :/

What Do Baby Kicks Feel Like?
Those flutters... Butterflies in your tummy?

Anyone Thinking About Getting Pregnant? [Here's my experiences so far.]
Shiny hair... Excess gas... Vomiting... The list goes on.

Doctor Says I Have A Mom Brain

2011-12-30T21:39:00.001-05:00

Today I was at my doctor's complaining about how my body, mind (and soul?) has changed dramatically from my pregnancy.

I can't organize anything in my head anymore... I used to be able to remember very long to-do lists in my head filled with many details on how to fulfill each task. Now I can hardly remember to put on deodorant in the morning. I guess those things are no longer important anymore???? I can't explain it. It's so hard for me to understand because I used to complain all the time about how I thought A.D.D was fake. [I DON'T HAVE A.D.D... :/]

I can't even remember to take my birth control pills each day and when I forget, I have no recollection of forgetting...That is bad. I don't need a horrific miracle right now [second bundle of joy]. Soon... but let's wait until after our honeymoon... or at least until our daughter is one year old!

My mind simply does not work the way it used to and it REALLY bothers me. I feel so bombarded with the necessary baby to-do things that it's hard to accomplish anything else. Don't ask me how our wedding plans are going... [They will get done before the special day. That's all I have to say about that.] I feel like I have no control over my life anymore.

My doctor says I have a mom brain right now but it will get better. I hope she's right because I hate being disorganized. I'm a multi-tasking, high-achieving, self-motivated person and since my pregnancy, I can't do all the stuff I used to because it's like my brain shut itself off. Is this my body's way of telling me to focus only upon my baby right now? Will I ever get my brain back? I mean come on... I'm only 23 years old.

Does anyone else have this feeling or am I the only one?

What is the Hardest Baby Stage?

2011-12-27T14:36:00.001-05:00

Every time I think I'm at the hardest baby stage, it seems to get worse. Babies are HARD WORK! Like really, I thought I was prepared for this! Right now Amelia is at this stage...

ROLL OVER ONTO BELLY.

SCREAM BECAUSE SHE'S STUCK & CAN'T ROLL BACK.

MOMMY COMES & FLIPS HER OVER.

ROLLS BACK ONTO BELLY.

REPEAT 100 TIMES.

She's been at this stage for a good three weeks now. I thought that just finding entertaining toys was difficult. Well that part still is difficult.. but now when she has toys she likes to play with, she flips over onto her belly and screams.

Aren't babies supposed to roll from belly to back by now? She is 5.5 months old. Hmm :/

Anyways, she has mastered lifting her head high on her belly! So all that I have to say is "WORK THOSE MUSCLES BABY GIRL! YOU CAN DO IT!" Rolling (from belly), Sitting, and Crawling can't come soon enough!

What other difficult baby stages do I have to look forward to...????? [Every single one! HA. Just kidding :/ ] Good thing she's so fricken cute! Otherwise, I don't know how I'd ever find the patience.

My mom took this picture while I was at work! :D

Amelia & The Christmas Tree

2011-12-24T15:25:00.000-05:00

This is my Amelia's FIRST Christmas!!!

I hope she will have lots of fun. <3

Our Christmas Decorations! [Apartment Tour]

2011-12-24T15:20:00.001-05:00

First time ever putting up a Christmas tree. [Fake.. until we have a house!]

Yeah, we should dust off the TV before family comes!

Fairies!!

Bill's First Christmas Ornament :) (precious!!)

Can you see me in the bulb? I'm holding the camera!

Our Baby Has Extra Sensitive Skin: Eczema

2011-12-22T14:04:00.001-05:00

We have a diagnosis! And it's not what I wanted to hear... Little Amelia has bad skin. :( She has eczema and her doctor says she doesn't know if it will go away or not since her daddy has a family history of it.

Eczema is a type of skin inflammation that causes dry, red, itchy, scaly skin. My baby has it on her face, forehead, scalp, neck, behind her ears, arms, hands, belly, back, and a little bit on her legs and bottom. It's so sad. It's basically everywhere on her body. I was really hoping it was only a simple rash that would go away with an ointment. But nope. Her forehead and eyes bother her the most. She rubs her eyes like crazy and lets out such a sad, bothered cry. It's a new cry I haven't heard before that came with her eczema. It makes me really sad and I try my best to hold her hands back so she doesn't scratch her skin and irritate it more.

In order to make her skin feel and look better, we now have to change all of her detergents, soaps, and lotions. They must be unscented and dye free from now on. This really is no fun for her. I'm a girl... I love perfume and good smelling shampoos and soaps! Her dad says he is able to wear cologne on his clothes but the instant it touches his skin, it gets irritated.

I learned a big lesson this week.

DON'T REGISTER FOR ALL LAVENDER SCENTED BABY PRODUCTS. You never know what kind of skin your baby will have... My family has never had a history of skin problems so I just naively assumed our daughter's skin would be fine. I have about 10 different kinds of lavender scented baby soaps, lotions, and baby oil! I can't use any of it now. She's been okay with them for five months but now that the weather finally reached freezing temperatures, her eczema broke out. Bill says that the cold weather dries out his skin (like normal skin) but really makes his eczema worse. So no more scents for her... for now!

Bill is confident that there is a solution and I hope he's right. We just have to use all the unscented, sensitive skin products and apply lotion on her frequently. He says if you take care of your skin it will be fine. He also says he doesn't take care of his skin so his is not fine. I have no reference point so I'm a little nervous. The doctor says that if it gets worse, she will prescribe a low dose of hydro-cortisone ointment. We have to make small life changes so her skin won't get so irritated, but in part we already changed things because of Bill's skin. Luckily, this is not a huge health problem and only an inconvenience. With good parenting and support, her skin will be just fine. We were worried she might be allergic to our cats, which would be a tragedy! [I need cats in my life, along with my man & baby!!]

Also, there is the possibility that she will outgrow her eczema. WHO KNOWS! I hope that will be the case for her.

I'm FREAKING busy!

2011-12-21T13:21:00.002-05:00

I am BUSY BUSY BUSY.

Countdown til Christmas-- 4 days (but we have a party we're hosting Christmas Eve)
Countdown til our Wedding-- 45 days

Here's my TO DO list... [It's freakin' scary!!]

Finish Christmas Shopping
Thoroughly Clean Apartment

Vacuum
Kitchen- counters/dishes/refrigerator
Clean tile floors
Bathroom
Put away ALL laundry that's in piles all over the bedroom floors! EEk!
Cat litter
Sort through big stack of papers on counter..

Edit Wedding Registries [Target's website is ridiculously slow during the holidays]
Find Wedding Cake
Find last few addresses for invites [Yes, WAY PAST DUE]
Buy Decorations for Wedding Reception
Renew Passport [Doing that in one hour... or whenever I'm free to leave my bedroom. Bill is wrapping my presents and is taking forever! Hopefully that means I got a million presents! :)]
Buy Wedding Bands- We bought Bill's yesterday...
Apply for Marriage License- after the holidays
Figure out what we are doing for our HONEYMOON!
Buy Veil & Accessories for Wedding Day
Figure out Hair/Makeup/Nails for Wedding Day

I have so much more to add to this list but since Bill is done wrapping my presents, I have no more time to think about what I'm supposed to be doing! I actually have to go do it now!!! Sorry if I bored anyone with this... but this is the reality of planning a wedding & taking care of baby & celebrating the holidays all at once. Luckily my mom took Amelia for the night so I can get some stuff done!

Life is good.

Baby Loves Bubbles

2011-12-19T22:46:00.003-05:00

I don't know about you, but the only real way to calm my fussy baby [who is already fed with a clean diaper] is to give her a nice, warm bubble bath. She absolutely loves to kick and splash the water everywhere. If you are stressed out due to all of the fussiness, let your baby play longer in the bath. I tried that today and it was almost relaxing for me as well! She did not fuss or cry or yell or scream or throw a temper tantrum or... you get it. She played with the bubbles, her rubber duck, animal squirt toys, and sucked her soapy hands while kicking water all over! It makes her smile though so it doesn't matter the mess she makes. We had to move her from the sink to the bath tub finally so we could keep some of the water from getting all over the floor.

After her bath, she gets her regular body massage. [spoiled/mommy's dream] I massage baby lotion all over her arms, legs, belly, and back. If she lets me I gently message her face too. She really enjoys it and it puts her in a good/relaxed mood until she's ready for her nap. Depending on my mood and her level of fussiness, I give her a bath before bed or in the mid afternoon before a nap.

Here are some pictures from bath time at three months old. [She's five months now but I haven't had a chance to get batteries for my camera... Actually I just keep forgetting. It's lame.]

Baby Flip Flopped Her Sleeping Schedule!

2011-12-13T19:08:00.001-05:00

Last night Amelia's bedtime was at 10:30pm. She didn't have any unusually long naps throughout the day, just her two to three normal naps. Normally when she goes to bed after 9:30pm, she will stay asleep until 7:00am, if not longer. I was looking forward to a nice night of sleep too because the two nights before, she woke me up for a bottle at 5:30am before barely going back to sleep before I had to get up for work. So I laid down in bed last night around midnight, after doing the majority of our wedding invitations. I had a good night and felt like I accomplished a lot and deserved a good night's rest!

Oh how I was wrong!

I don't know what happened... or WHY THIS HAPPENED...? But Amelia woke up at 2:30am.

For good.

I tried bringing her into my bed to sleep but she just fidgeted. I woke up about 50 times all the way until my alarm clock went off at 7:30am. She wasn't just being fussy though. She was laughing, kicking, babbling, moving, thrusting her arms back and forth, shaking her head back and forth. Finally around 4:30am, I tried moving her back to her crib to "play". FAIL. She cried within 10 minutes. I brought her back in my bed and was seriously feeling like I would die of sleep deprivation. She drifted off for 20 minutes here and there, but it didn't feel like it. I was up several times every hour. I was so angry. But then she would just laugh at me... I have no clue where she found all that energy!

My job requires that I have adequate sleep because I am analyzing and discussing questions. There is no way to fully concentrate on three hours of sleep. I tried today. THREE BIG MUGS OF COFFEE. ONE LARGE MOUNTAIN DEW. :/ I could have went to sleep after drinking all that caffeine. While I performed "alright", my level of accuracy/focus dropped by at least 50% from normal. :/ Blah! I don't really know how mothers can go back to work after only six weeks of maternity leave. At six weeks, Amelia was not sleeping through the night yet. I was still waking up every 1-3 hours through the night to nurse her. I can't imagine having to work under such circumstances. Anyways, I'm EXPECTING tonight to be better! I can't survive another day of no sleep!

On a better note, someone called me a princess today at work.

Well.. not really but someone said that I looked like Kate Middleton. No one has ever told me that before but hey, it boosted my confidence for about 5 minutes... [as I dreamed of life as a princess]. It was a temporarily nice feeling.

I guess it's the hair!

How Do You Keep Your Sanity & Patience?

2011-12-11T20:28:00.001-05:00

For some reason the last few days have been a living hell. It doesn't really help that I am recovering from Bronchitis but I seriously might go insane. I can no longer tolerate a fussy baby. I can no longer tolerate a crying baby. I can't tolerate even entertaining my baby. She is taking over my life 200% and I feel like I am suffocating and that there is no escape. She is a beautiful, happy, loving, smiling, perfect baby BUT right now my mommy switch has been involuntarily shut off! What do I do? I can't wait to go to work tomorrow because my head is literally steaming. Everything is making me angry. It's not simple agitation, it's full blown i-want-to-bang-my-head-on-the-floor psychotic anger! I can't handle shaking a rattle and singing today. She has been put to bed at eight o'clock the past two nights [which is about two hours early] because I can't take baby crabbiness anymore.

It doesn't help that Bill has been off on his sleep schedule the past few days either. He is still working third shifts and we had a Christmas party to attend today. I feel like he is either working, exhausted/non-functioning, or sleeping. Today he was so tired he accidentally answered his phone when his work called and was forced to go in early tonight. He's slept a total of six hours in the past 48 hours or longer. He's sleeping now but he will only get a total of five hours. My stress is coming from his job because I don't know how to calm the fussy baby. [IS SHE TEETHING???] My job is not only to take care of the baby, but to make sure she doesn't scream at all and wake Bill up. She has woken him up many times already. He actually got out of bed twice to see what was wrong. I don't know what's wrong! All I know is that I need a break before my mind breaks.

Sorry for venting, but I just realized that I have only been posting positive things about motherhood. [Or at least it feels like I've only been writing about sunshine and rainbows.] In order to be honest and real in my writing, sometimes I need to write about the downside of having a baby. Today I've reached my limit. And not surprisingly... Amelia has woken up already and is pouting/grunting/IDK in her crib! I pray she falls asleep..

...

...

Silence again. Thank god.

Anyways, does anyone else get frustrated with their babies? I don't mean to be a mean, heartless mother. I love my baby and do not regret having her. I would not want to live without her because she has changed me in so many unexplainable ways that I couldn't go back to life without children!

If anyone is willing to admit frustrations, what do you do to regain strength again? How do I turn that mommy-switch back on to sunshine, lollipops, and mega-mind strength? lol. Seriously, any advice would be greatly appreciated!

Seven Survival Tips for Life with a Newborn

2011-12-10T16:22:00.001-05:00

1. Drink coffee. If you are breastfeeding [like I was] and your baby is sleeping well [15-20 hours per day], DRINK COFFEE. I don't know about you, but coffee gives me motivation and inspiration to save the world!

2. Apply Lanolin 100X/Day. I couldn't believe that the OB nurses and lactation consultants told me to give it a good month and my nipples would feel better. ONE MONTH OF SORE NIPPLES AND SCREAMING BABY AND SLEEP DEPRIVATION. I thought I would die. Lanolin soothed not only my nipples, but my soul.

3. Sleep ALL DAY if you can. Ha! All day. Yeah right. You can't even get a night's sleep. But luckily my baby slept on and off 24/7. She slept. I slept. It was simple. If I didn't have to leave my house, [which I rarely did] I stayed in pajamas, if not almost naked all day, everyday. I slept on and off all day. And even though it felt like I never got enough sleep, it did help. I promise.

4. Repeat mantra "It will get better." I think most babies start sleeping five-six hours during the second month. My baby did anyways. Those extra hours, yet so few seemed like a miracle. I never knew how much you could appreciate only five hours of sleep. [I can sleep 10-12 hours if you let me!] Also, feeding times will decrease. My baby eats every three hours during the day, but she can sleep 8-11 hours at night [at five months old]!

5. Cry!! But don't be afraid to get support from other mothers. I was really emotional. I'm sure the majority of us are after having a baby. If you need to cry, don't feel like you shouldn't. Just cry and cry and cry. Nothing has to be wrong! Really though, I cried a lot. I got a lot of support from my mom and friends. I even had a few nurses come to my house to help out with ANYTHING. Questions. Concerns. Emotion Outbreaks. Counseling... haha

6. Do something you enjoyed before being pregnant. Looking back, I don't know how I managed it but when my baby was only two weeks old my best friend and I went out for a drink. I nursed my baby right before I left and was only out for a couple hours. Luckily my baby took a bottle of previously pumped breast milk just fine. I pumped and dumped the milk when I got home. It didn't cause any problems with nursing. Not everyone gets so lucky... [just as a precaution]. The point is do something you haven't been able to do for awhile when you work up the energy! It's refreshing!

7. Enjoy the cuddle time. Not all babies like to cuddle their whole lives! The big time to cuddle is those first couple months when a baby wants nothing more than to be in her mother's arms. Take a moment to look at your precious baby sleeping. That moment is worth all the other struggles!

I Can't Believe I've been a Mom for 5 Months!

2011-12-10T12:44:00.001-05:00

Today Amelia is officially FIVE MONTHS old. Seriously? Where did the time go!? I really can't believe it. It's weird because I hardly remember her being such a tiny newborn. We went Christmas shopping last night as a family to the mall. I saw so many babies that were ridiculously tiny! It really made me miss the first couple months of Amelia's life. I hadn't realized how much she has grown already! It's insane! And to think... she is still really little. She's only five months old. She has only been with us for five months!! [Sorry], it's really hard for me to believe how big she has grown in such a small amount of time. And at the same time, it's hard for me to believe she is already five months!! CRAZY.

This scares me because Bill & I want to have another baby fairly soon. As long as I have a full time job, we want to start trying around the end of next summer. In reality, anytime after our wedding in February would be okay. But I don't want to be pregnant again so soon! That would be... awful? exhilarating? frightening? amazing? I'm not so sure we are ready quite yet. Time is flying by so fast though! Will I ever be ready to have another baby? I don't know... I think it's too soon to start wondering/worrying about this possibly!

But just seeing all the newborns at the mall really make me miss the first few months! Amelia requires so much more attention now compared to her first three months. Back then, I always knew why she cried. She was either hungry or needed a diaper change. Period. Otherwise, she mainly slept in her bouncy chair or in my arms. Now she still has those issues but also possible teething pains, boredom, true fussy times, and frustration! I feel like I have to entertain her 24/7 now! She gets too bored laying on her back or tummy for too long. I have to constantly switch toys she's playing with because she can't do it herself yet! I am always singing songs to her and doing huge hand/body motions because it's her favorite! She loves story time. As much as I love seeing her laugh and babble, it's getting to be exhausting! I know I'll probably regret saying this but I can't wait til she can crawl around so she can entertain herself a little better.

As even more time goes by I'm excited to watch her learn even more new things. One of her favorite things to do this past... her whole life has been to lick/suck on anything that comes close to her mouth! It's cute and I'm wondering when this will stop?? I'm not usually around many babies so I don't really know when babies do this or that and stop doing this or that! It's a learning experience..

...

I still can't believe I've been a mom for five months!

Bright Starts Bounce-A-Bout Activity Center

2011-11-30T23:19:00.000-05:00

This is one of Amelia's favorite toys... or should I say "Activity Center"! She loves it because there are so many fun things to look at. The best part about this toy is that there are NO BATTERIES REQUIRED and she still loves it! I hung up another Bright Starts Tug n Pull Musical Pig on it so there's some music for her to listen to. There are seven different toys on it and you can order more off their website. We probably won't order anymore because we have a lot of other toys we clip on to it. There's also a little tray where you can set more toys, pacifiers, or even a sippy cup [filled with water of course ;)] on it.

My mom isn't thrilled with this activity center because she can't walk around the house with it like she wants her to. I like it because it keeps her entertained in one place! She still gets her exercise because she can bounce on it! She hasn't quite mastered the bouncing aspect of it yet but soon! We registered for this for our baby shower and happily received it as a gift! We thought the bouncers would be safer than the baby walkers so she doesn't get into anything she's not supposed to. This would definitely be the better option for those with stairs!

10 Things I Love About Being a Mommy

2011-11-30T16:59:00.001-05:00

It really is the little things that bring the most joy to life.

[In no particular order.]

Baby Smiles: My baby can smile when I'm in the worst mood ever and that will be enough to make me smile too. I can be so angry and then she'll laugh at me and suddenly I feel all better, if only for a few minutes.
Baby Milestones: Any new thing my baby learns is enough to celebrate! The first time she reached for her toys... The first time she rolled over... The first time she used a bottle.. The first time she rode in her car seat home from the hospital... The first time in her stroller... The first time she made a noise other than crying... The first time she smiled... laughed... cooed... screeched! The first time she took a bath... The first time she put her own pacifier in her mouth. I can't wait until she crawls, sits up by herself, starts eating solids, and walks by herself! All these firsts make me grab my camera, call my mom and tell her, and write them down in her baby book. Depending on the milestone, it's even enough to grab a glass of wine with Bill after dinner! It's just exciting that she's growing and learning new things. I guess I can't really explain why it's exciting. It just is.
I Get to Be a Kid Again on the Holidays: I am taking my daughter to see Santa Claus this month! How cool! I can't even remember the last time I visited Santa. It's been quite some time...! I get to be the one to make sure Santa enjoys his milk & cookies that we set out! ;) And as long as she's been a good baby, she'll get to open presents from Santa. We will get to visit the Easter Bunny too! And do fun holiday activities like Easter egg hunts and dressing up at Halloween. I still dress up for Halloween but it's going to be fun to share the holiday excitement with our daughter.
Snuggle/Cuddle Time: I never knew how cute babies were... I really never realized how precious they are. They are tiny, little baby humans... haha! Think about it. It's crazy that they will grow up into one of us someday! I looove taking naps with my baby. She snuggles her head on my chest and falls asleep... like a little angel! [until she wakes up crying!] Her cheeks are so pudgy and round. It's hard not to wake her by giving her so many kisses! Now she doesn't love cuddling 24/7, but when she starts rubbing her eyes, that's my cue to wrap her in a blanket and rock her in my arms! It warms my heart <3.
Playing Dress Up: I love dressing my baby in cute little outfits. Since I have a girl, I love putting her in dresses and cute floral pants. I was lucky to have a baby born with some hair so we put little headbands, flowers, bows, and ribbons in her hair to doll her up. She's so beautiful! I'm hoping we will have a baby boy next because I just love little boy slacks and flannel or button up long sleeve shirts. I will put a little stylish cap on him. Awww.. I just love baby clothes. The coolest thing is that with babies they will look cute in almost anything you put on them!
Showing Her Off: It's so fun bringing my baby everywhere because people are just drawn to babies! I had random strangers coming up to me in stores when I was pregnant and now that I have my baby, they're still coming up to me! I don't mind though. They all point and talk to her in a funny baby voice. "Aww look at the wittle baaaby guwrll". It's great. I feel so proud to be the one that gets to keep her! :D
Playing Peek-A-Boo, Supergirl, & The Itsy Bitsy Spider: These are currently my baby's favorite games. We can play peek-a-boo anywhere and everywhere and she'll just have a blast. Same thing for Supergirl... I lift her in the air and she smiles sooo big! Right when I say Supergirl, she starts smiling because she knows what's gonna happen next. Her absolute favorite song is the Itsy Bitsy Spider. I sing this song over and over doing the hand motions because she absolutely loves it. If she's crying... even screaming I can sing this song and she'll stop and listen to it. I know this category is very similar to the Baby Smiles one but this is different because I am the one making her happy. It's comforting that she likes her mommy and that I can entertain her. :D
More Extended Family Time: We already keep in touch with our families pretty well. But since babies grow so fast, everyone wants to see her more so they don't miss out on her growing up! That means we all get to see more of our families. Now we already do see our families quite a bit, but let's face it... people are drawn to babies! It puts an increase on the number of visitors! :D No big deal.
Learning a New Way of Life: I am not a different person now that I'm a mother but I am learning how to live differently. I can't do everything the same way that I used to because I have a baby to take care of and to guide growing up. I can't just stay out til midnight whenever I feel like. There are cons of having a baby that interfere with the sudden change in your life but I'm seeing a new perspective of life now. I understand some of the life of a mother. I still have LOTS of learning because I only have a four month old! But I think about how I was when I was a baby and what my mom went through... and all mothers that I know. I understand new things... It's just interesting how I suddenly have a different lifestyle. I have to do a little planning now. That's all. Doesn't mean I can't enjoy my life.
WE MADE OUR BABY! : No one else can make the same exact baby we did. She is unique to Bill & I. I'm just bewildered by this still. My baby grew inside of me and came out of thin air! Well, it feels like it anyways! It's just a weird feeling that's kind of neat to think about.

Our Nuh Night Bedtime Routine

2011-11-30T00:37:00.001-05:00

I never thought a four month old baby could enjoy story time as much as she does. Before Amelia was born, I asked the nurse who came to visit us at home when a good time would be to start reading to a baby. She said from day one! The sooner the better! I was surprised because I found it silly. But she was right. I started reading books to Amelia around the second month and she was fascinated with the them. [or so it seemed!!] Even though she can't understand the story quite yet, she certainly loves looking at the big, bright colored pictures. She always gets excited and kicks her legs before I read to her.

I could be wrong, but I think it is a VERY important activity to spend doing with your children. Reading is so beneficial for learning, bonding, and entertaining. They will discover the lives of many new characters and take on adventures with them. Books will help your children learn how to read and SPELL! The more you read, the better your spelling should be since you see it written over and over again. I thoroughly enjoy reading so I want to give my daughter the opportunity to discover books too. If she doesn't enjoy reading in the long run [which I don't see how that's possible! :/ ] then at least she will get a glimpse of what she'll be learning when school comes and she's forced to read!

For now, we have set a fun bedtime activity of reading some bright picture books. We stretch out on my bed on our backs and I hold the book up above her head and read. I try my best to read in different voices and with enthusiasm so she can enjoy it. :D I also think reading aloud helps your baby develop language too because they are listening to you talk to them. Sometimes Amelia stares at me while I'm reading the book instead of looking at the pages... funny but as long as she's enjoying it, it's allll good!

Bedtime Routine

Bottle
Change Diaper
Pajamas
Story Time/ Cuddle Time <3
Crib with Winnie the Pooh mobile playing

Zombie Dad on Thirds

2011-11-27T17:22:00.001-05:00


He might not be so pleased to see that I've used these pics for my blog! :D

I know I have already tweeted about this several times, [for those of you who follow me on Twitter], but I am really frustrated by Bill's work schedule! He works in dispatch at the police station and while it is important for people to do that job, it is also important for them to keep a semi-consistent schedule so family life is not so SCREWY. Since he started this job in March (?) he has already covered all the shifts... two or three times already! He changes what shift he is on each month. Right now he switched to THIRD SHIFT again... I hate him on thirds. I swear it is worse than seconds because he cannot figure out his sleep schedule. He tries to sleep once he gets home at 9:30am until 5:00pm. The problem is that we have a four month old who is not the quietest baby! She has her fussy moments. She has her giggly, happy moments that are loud. Bill sleeps with the fan on the room, but today he came walking outta the bedroom at 1:30pm, saying he's up. He's too hungry to sleep and he woke up every time Amelia cried this morning, which he says was four times. GREAT, I'm thinking to myself. This is bad because he will be irritable (understandingly of course) and he will eventually have to go back to sleep. I look forward to our time together and it's too hard with him being a Zombie Dad all day & night.

If he could stay on one shift, which I guess he is supposed to stay on one shift after a year or so of training, it would be better. We can work around any shift if it's over a longer period of time, because then we get used to it and his body adjusts to his schedule. But now, it's 5:30pm and he's in bed... He told me about thirty minutes ago that he hadn't slept the entire time he was laying down... {wtf}. JUST A LITTLE MORE COMPLAINING. Once he finally gets his sleep schedule adjusted to third shift, he will change back to FIRST SHIFT on Christmas Day. Man they really know how to screw him over. I was thinking that third shift would at least be good for the holidays so he wouldn't have to miss any parties. They sure showed me.

BLAHhhhhhhhhh!

Yes we are very thankful that he got this job. It doesn't cover all our bills [student loans mainly] but it is a good job to begin his career with. And he doesn't complain very much. I do most of it for him. I guess it's something I'm good at. Like a gift or something... hehe :D

A Stroll Down Memory Lane

2011-11-26T22:40:00.001-05:00

Just found these pictures posted on [my bff's] Candace's Facebook. These brought me back! WAY BACK! Though, honestly this is how I looked only five months ago! I can't believe it. I hardly remember myself being this pregnant! They were taken at my baby shower, about a month before Amelia was born. @8MONTHSPREGNANT!

The camera lens must be fogged or something.. Sorry about the haze! :/

I love this one! LOL

Shari & I <3

Multitasking Mommy!

2011-11-25T14:26:00.001-05:00

I didn't know how well I could multitask until Amelia was born. I was really good at it before, but now I'm becoming a professional! The coolest part is that I'm still getting better and better everyday. My baby is only four months old so she's not even crawling yet! I can't imagine how my skills will grow once she's crawling/walking and pulling out all my movies and books from their shelves! At first, I was kind of frustrated that all the attention my baby required. I felt like I couldn't do anything besides feed, change dirty diapers, and play with her. That is all a joy but 24/7??? Everyone needs to enjoy ALL of life's wonderful activities! Soooo lately, I've been getting into cooking wonderful meals with new recipes and foods I've never even tried before. Obviously that takes some time. For me, it requires a good couple hours back and forth, around the kitchen. With an infant, that seems almost impossible! But let me tell you, it's not!

We play peek-a-boo over the counter tops, behind pots & pans, with the potholders, with a gallon of milk, etc. We sing songs and dance... well it's mainly me who does the entertaining in between stirring the boiling liquids, checking the food in the oven, and cleaning the huge mess I made! I drag her swing into the kitchen so she can play with toys and swing while I figure out what the heck I'm trying to cook. Once she gets bored with that, I sit her in her high chair with apples using the Munchkin Food Nets. We set books on the high chair, along with her plastic keys, teddy bears, farm animals, even the whole farm! It really is kind of hectic, especially on her fussy days when she doesn't like to cooperate but it's doable! Once she's done being in the high chair, I lay her on her activity play pad and she plays with her rattles, mirrors, and musical animals. She entertains herself and when she gets bored I make funny sounds and talk to her. I mainly narrate everything I'm doing in funny voices and in occasionally break out into song. It's fun and she giggles and coos! Then when daddy walks through the door around 5:30pm, she's all his while I finish place setting the table and pouring milk into our glasses!!

Life is definitely more interesting with a cute wittle tiny fussy pudgy baby bumpkin!

Munchkin Food Nets

2011-11-25T13:39:00.001-05:00

I recently bought a Munchkins Food Net for my teething (?) baby. These food nets are amazing! Right now she is only four and a half months, so we haven't really started solid foods yet. I still plan on waiting awhile longer before introducing solids but since she appears to be teething, I've been peeling apples and putting them inside the food nets for her. This way she has a nutritious, soothing toy to chew on. The first time we gave it to her she absolutely loved it. She chewed/sucked on the food net like a popsicle. It's sooo cuute and funny! It really was a lifesaver. After hours of fussing/screaming, this was the only thing that calmed her. I'm almost positive it was soothing her gums. I recommend these to all teething babies, especially if they aren't doing well with solids yet. These nets have a handle that snaps tightly shut, preventing the food chunks from entering the baby's mouth. Later, when we start to give her more solids, I'll put more fruits and vegetables inside. But until she's at least six months, I'm only putting apples in them. :)

Baby Steps also makes their own version of the food net. I haven't tried this one but it serves the same purpose as the Munchkins version.

I know my baby is the cutest in the world, do you?

2011-11-18T23:03:00.001-05:00

Everyday I know I'm the luckiest mom ever because I have the cutest baby in the entire world! Seriously! I'm assuming all moms think this way.. If not, I just don't understand! I genuinely believe I have the cutest baby ever. I know my opinion is biased because I'm the mommy but still. She's a sweet little baby doll. She has such big beautiful blue eyes that are filled with curiosity. She has the perfect little pudgy baby cheeks. Her belly is a cute potbelly, big and round! She has a pretty little voice even when she screeches. Her facial expressions are all so unique, funny, and precious (maybe not the grouchy ones but in their own special way, yes!) She's super cute with clothes and just naked, splashing around in her baby tub. Her face lights up with excitement all the time. She smiles and laughs at everything she sees. Amelia is a wonderful baby and every time I look at her the only thing I see is a pure angel! Of course she can be a little monster at times, but overall I've never seen something as sweet and beautiful as my little baby girl. I don't mean to sound arrogant. I'm hoping everyone sees their own baby as I do mine. I can't explain the feeling I get when I'm with her nor do I feel like trying because words can't describe the emotion. She's just a CUTIE PATOOTIE & my little sweetheart! I just love her soooo much! :D

Also, be sure to read the 10 Reasons I Love Being a Mommy!

My Experience Using Fenugreek

2011-11-17T20:13:00.001-05:00

I feel guilty and ashamed to be feeding Amelia so much formula! She's only four months and I am almost unable to nurse her... :( I tried using Fenugreek a month ago to help with this situation. Fenugreek is an herb that's supposed to help increase milk supply and help maintain the overall health of your breasts. The first two weeks I took two 500mg capsules three times a day, as directed by the bottle. I was really good about not forgetting to take it because I was desperate to increase my milk supply. It made me smell sweet. [sweeter than I already am! pff..] Sweet like maple syrup. I could smell it especially if I did some type of exercise. It was like I was sweating maple syrup. How pleasant! Anyways after two weeks of taking this herb, there was no noticeable change in my milk supply. :( I might have messed it up by starting an eight hour work day but I pumped consistently. Once at 7:30am, 12:00pm, 4:15pm, and then every 2-3hrs after until bedtime which is around 10-11pm. After two weeks, I kinda lost hope already and only took two capsules once or twice each day for another week or two. But now I have officially stopped all together. I still pump consistently but I only get about 3-4 ounces per day. THAT IS BAD. Let me repeat. THAT IS REALLY BAD. I keep thinking, "Okay, so for the next baby I will know how to keep up my milk supply. I won't supplement as many bottles of formula too early. I won't stop pumping consistently. During the first month when my milk supply is ridiculous and I am LOADED with milk, I will pump like crazy!" I just feel bad because I want to keep giving Amelia breast milk, especially since winter is coming. Colds and flues get passed around more often when it's cold so I want Amelia to have as much protection against viruses as possible! I will keep pumping and trying but Fenugreek has failed me.

I still do have hope that Fenugreek may work for other women. I might not have pumped enough to stimulate milk production. My diet hasn't been the greatest/healthiest lately. Lastly, I don't know if I have been drinking enough fluids or not...

What is really nice and comforting is that I can still nurse Amelia each morning when she wakes up. I never thought I would miss breastfeeding but I really do! It's our snuggle time. It's mommy-baby time. :( I'm hoping to be able to keep it up until she's at least six months old! That is my goal-- hope I'm successful!

Pumpkin Carving + Messy Baby!!

2011-10-31T15:59:00.002-04:00

We got to carve an extra pumpkin this year! [For Miss Amelia!] We were a little last-minute carving pumpkins the night before Halloween but better late than never! When picking out pumpkins, my only concern was that Amelia had to be able to fit inside the pumpkin! :D Hope you enjoy the pumpkin pictures. I sure am enjoying the pumpkin seeds!

Oohh it's cold in here!

But it's fun!!

There's gooey stuff between my toes!!


I like it! Hehehe

Nummy... it even tastes good!

Okay.. what's going on here?

Too bright...

What is this stuff?

Whoa now!

Really mom? You put pumpkin guts on my head. Really appreciate it, thanks.

At the Pumpkin Farm

2011-10-31T15:03:00.000-04:00

I absolutely love Autumn! When we buy our own house I want to have enough land to raise bees and ducks, and grow a large garden. I want to grow all the fall crops-- pumpkins, squash, etc. I really want to get into landscaping and grow beautiful flowers, shrubs, and flower trees. Can't wait! Here's some snapshots of our trip to Orchard Hill Farm.

We also took some pictures of Amelia sitting inside her pumpkin! She was a messy baby!

GEESE!

WILD rabbits???

Fluffy Bunny!


I love honey sticks so much that I want to raise bees to make my own!

Sexy Cock!

She really is at least 2' tall.

Proud Daddy. Sleepy baby girl!

Benefits of Infant Massage

2011-10-26T22:52:00.002-04:00

I know there are tons of benefits of getting a massage but I never considered giving my baby one until my friend recommended it to us. Today I had an Infant Massage Specialist come over to my place. There are several physical and mental health benefits from doing infant message. A gentle massage given to your baby benefits not only your baby but you too! The most important benefit is that just by doing it you and your baby have an extra bonding activity. You both are interacting with each other in a new special way. Touching your baby skin to skin has the same effects as a hug. When you give a hug, you feel just as good as the person receiving the hug. It's a reciprocal action, felt by both sides. Plus, it feels good for your baby!

Some health benefits include, but are not limited to helping babies with

Colic
Fussiness
Gas Expulsion
Constipation
Indigestion
Colds [clearing sinuses]
Tension
Flexibility
Stretching
Relaxation
Body Awareness
Toning Digestive Tract

It is very important to ask permission to your baby before giving a massage. For example, before massaging each body part say, "Can mommy massage your legs Amelia?" [Obviously stating your baby's name.] Even though she is not going to respond at three months old with "YES!!", you will begin to teach your baby respect and healthy touch. It will also let your baby know something is about to happen.

The best time to give your baby a massage is when they are in a quiet alert stage of wakefulness. The specialist that came over suggested making massage a part of your baby's bedtime routine. We tried it tonight and Amelia really enjoyed having her belly and legs massaged. As for her face... she wanted nothing of it! We are going to try and incorporate this into her bedtime routine so she will get used to knowing when bedtime is coming. This will help relax her, hopefully making her fall asleep easier. [and more peaceful!]

The lady that came over offered free instructions to baby infant massage. She will come back in a month and answer any questions that come up. It was a fun activity to do and I recommend everyone to give it a chance! Call up your hospital and ask for infant massage specialists in your area. You may find some free resources as I did :)

No Live Sports for Miss Amelia

2011-10-22T23:52:00.002-04:00

I have to dedicate a small post to AMELIA & LIVE SPORTS especially after the Michigan State Spartans EPIC win against the Wisconsin Badgers tonight!

GO GREEN!!

[just sayin'!]

Okay but really... I thought it was going to be fun to dress Amelia up in MSU gear for the big games but it's not going as planned. Every time there is a huge play-- good or bad, I yell loudly. And so does Amelia. Actually she screams and doesn't stop for a good 15 minutes! I don't mean to sound big and scary... but apparently that's how I appear to her. She has been with me for almost every MSU football game this year and a couple Tigers games.. I fail to keep quiet so at least once every single ballgame, Amelia screams and fears for her life! It's sad because I'm having fun and she is freaking out! Poor little baby girl :( Hopefully next football season will be better for her!

Help! I Don't Know How To Be a Mommy Anymore!

2011-10-22T19:34:00.002-04:00

I am having so much trouble figuring out what Amelia wants when she cries. Up until this past two weeks, I always knew what my baby wanted when she cried. She was either hungry, gassy and needed burped, or her diaper was dirty. Now I am at a loss. All those things are taken care of and she still fusses! Today she screamed on and off for about two hours. She is just super fussy all the time it seems. I do everything I can think of... rock her, rub her tummy, rub her back, put her in her swing and bouncy chair, sing to her, lay her on her back surrounded by toys, walk around with her, stroller rides, talk to her, stand in front of the mirror with her, put her in her crib with her mobile.... and many other things. I don't know if she is starting to teeth early, if she is sick, if she is bored, or what! It's frustrating. It was almost easier when I was sleep deprived and had to be up with her every 2 hours because at least I knew why she cried! EEEeeek! I hope she isn't starting to be colicky. She's been such a good, easy baby until these last weeks.

Don't criticize me for this... because I feel EXTREMELY GUILTY but right now she is staring peacefully at the television. She is watching some toddler cartoon show. She just started noticing the television and finds it fascinating. I know the television should not be used as a babysitter all the time. I know that there is some correlation between babies/children watching too much TV and ADD. But today, I almost lost my mind. I feel like she needs me every single second or else she screams...and regardless she screams! Before, she would at least take several naps that allowed me to have some "me" time. Don't get me wrong, I love being with her and playing with her but if she's just gonna scream all day long... how am I supposed to keep my sanity?? I hope this is just a stage... a short one!

Breastfeeding Crisis at 3 Months

2011-10-22T18:17:00.001-04:00

I am having a major crisis. I feel like I am failing as a mother because I have fallen into the "convenience trap" of formula feeding. This past month, I gave Amelia so many bottles of formula that I'm beginning to dry up! I haven't been devoting my time to breastfeeding like I should be doing. Amelia used to nurse really well every morning. Now I can hardly get her to nurse for longer than one minute. Originally, I set a three month breastfeeding goal for myself. I achieved it but now I feel that it is my responsibility as a mother to give her breast milk until she is at least six months old. I know that breast milk is the best thing for her. It's much better than formula and since I am able to produce milk for her, I shouldn't stop simply because it's easier and faster to heat up a bottle and put powder in it.

In order to get myself back on the right track, I am going to start supplementing my diet with 500mg capsules of Fenugreek. It is an herb that is supposed to help nursing women increase their milk supply. I am also going to focus on drinking lots of water. Today specifically, I am doing power pumping sessions. I'm basically pumping every hour. It's VERY time consuming but I really want to give Amelia more breast milk than formula.

I have already started a post on "My Experience Using Fenugreek" so I can let everyone know whether or not it is effecting my milk supply. I plan to update everyone on my progress once each week. As of now I do not know how long I plan on taking it.

Wish me luck!

Which is the Best Pacifer?

2011-09-27T18:12:00.000-04:00

We have about a dozen different kinds of pacifiers lying around the house. We received them all as baby shower presents. I didn't think it would matter which pacifier to use because I figured they would all work the same. You plop them in the baby's mouth and they suck it. Easy. But that's not how it went. A lot of them would just pop out of Amelia's mouth as she tried to suck on them. I can tell when she wants her pacifier and when she's just spitting them out for fun. She makes a "icky" face if I put her pacifier in her mouth and she doesn't want it. Maybe my pacifier reviews are biased according to what Amelia prefers but I'll still share what I've found out.

I thought these Gumdrop Pacifiers below were really cool because they didn't look like normal pacifiers. You can stick your finger in the nipple of the pacifier while the baby is sucking so she ends up sucking your finger... However, these ones are no good. They fall out of Amelia's mouth all the time. I've used them on and off but at nighttime it's a nightmare using them. I have to put the pacifier in her mouth every minute or else she would cry!

The First Years Gumdrop Pacifiers

This MAM pacifier stayed in Amelia's mouth pretty well but when she was done it left marks on her face. I know all pacifiers leave the pacifier imprints around the baby's mouth but this one was worse! Look at the design and use your imagination to see what a baby's mouth would look like after sucking on it. Haha. We only use this one for emergencies because she just looks ridiculous afterwords. I doubt it actually hurts her but still...

MAM Perfect Universal Pacifier

We received a few dollar store quality pacifiers. Don't buy those... They are cheap and poorly made. On our pacifiers there is a sharp edge to the plastic where two different pieces fit to together... Hard to explain but steer clear because I said sharp edge. Enough said!

Now on to my favorite pacifier-- Nuk pacifiers! They are cute and allow for Amelia to suck on them for extended periods of time. The only time these pacifiers fall out is when Amelia simply does not want one. Perfect.

Nuk Pacifiers!!

I did like the pacifier that Metro Health Hospital gave us but unfortunately it was stepped on...

Funny thing.

I told myself I would not introduce a pacifier until Amelia was at least two weeks or older because I was worried she would have problems latching on/breastfeeding. But ohh how I lied to myself! I ended up giving her a pacifier the first night at the hospital! I was sleep deprived and she wanted to nurse every 30 minutes... which is basically all the time. So we plugged her mouth with the pacifier! Haha :] And she had no problems latching on so it was worth it in the end.

My Ideas to Travel & Work Abroad with My Family

2011-09-25T16:06:00.001-04:00

My life long dream has been to travel and live abroad. I have always wanted a job that allows me to work and afford living in other countries. Specifically, I'd love to live anywhere in Western Europe but I could settle for... basically anywhere else that's relatively safe. Taiwan? Japan? China? Somewhere in South America or how about Russia. I'd even go to CANADA... And because I'm getting desperate I would even like to work somewhere else in the United States. California would be awesome! But since that's unrealistic because of the cost of living, I'd consider Colorado, Wyoming, Florida, Vermont, Tennessee, New York, Texas. You should be able to tell that I really don't care where I go. I love exploring new places and meeting people with different points of view on life. Yes, I could do that all in Michigan. I love Michigan by the way. But there are not any super tall mountains here. I've hiked all over the Porcupine Mountains and while I loved it, I want to go higher. There are beautiful Great Lakes that I have explored many times, but I want to see new waters. There's not any BIG cities here, and I've already been to the important ones anyways. I just want to go somewhere, just because. I have had an inner drive for "GOING SOMEWHERE" my entire life. Maybe it has something to do with my mom moving me around all my childhood? I don't know. [I've gone to 8 different schools before college. Then 3 more adding on college experience.]

My ideas on how to travel and work abroad consist of the following career paths.

Teaching English... finding work contracts through the schools directly, hiring a nanny or bilingual daycare center (big cities only), or enrolling Amelia into local schools when she's of age. Many schools will give you a living stipend, and/or include the cost of tuition for a child's school if you teach English there. Both Bill & I could teach English.
Foreign Service Officer... This is my dream career. I am taking the Foreign Service Officer Test October 6, 2011 but it's really hard for me to find hope & optimism that will help convince myself that I MIGHT be able to pass it. This would cover everything my family & I need to work as a world representative of the United States. It would be easy traveling because we'd be cared for. The job would be much more demanding, but it'd like that and it'd be worth it.
Master's School Abroad... I'd have to get into a program that gives me a decent scholarship and work placement. This way I could have direct connections to work abroad once I finish my Master's Program.

Am I being selfish? My fiancé has always known my passion for traveling. When we first started dating on December 21, 2004, I was already saving money and enrolled into a Study Abroad program through AFS to complete my junior year of high school in Belgium. We have been dating for about 6.5 years [with some breaks] but I have told him over and over the kind of lifestyle I wanted to live. And he still proposed to me! SOOOO... IDK. I tell him my ideas of what we can do all the time. It's mainly me doing all of the work too and he has stopped listening to me. I don't know what to do besides feel lost. I'm looking for a local job now in some kind of social work setting. Maybe if I build up a skill and complete a Master's program first, THEN I can work abroad in that field...

My mom moved to Texas with me when I was 3 years old for less than a year. I remember living there briefly but I am happy to have lived there. I am happy to have moved all over Michigan. I wish she moved me to other states or countries when I was little. I would LOVE to have learned different languages and cultures so young. I don't know how much I would have loved it when I was little but I wouldn't know anything else so it'd be fine. I don't think there is anything wrong with traveling often for work with children. I think it's a privilege.

I'm just a little depressed is all. I don't want to be stuck, just because it's easier... I am a highly motivated person who likes to do things above and beyond. I don't know why. I don't know how to stop myself from thinking/feeling this way. It'd be easier if I could just be content staying here, close to home for the rest of my life. I don't know if that's possible though.

Pretty in Blue

2011-09-24T11:18:00.003-04:00

Mini Photoshoot!

[~10 weeks old~]

Sleepy Mommy (& Daddy!) Pictures

2011-09-24T00:28:00.002-04:00

Here's a small collection of my baby-bliss-glamor shots taken mainly during the first month of Amelia's life. I was completely and entirely sleep deprived during this period. Notice the large bags underneath my puffy eyes! :D I breastfed her every 2-4 hours around the clock. That means that she interrupted my REM cycle every night... did I even get a REM cycle? Ha.. Regardless after the first month, Amelia started sleeping 5-6 hours at one time. And now at 10 weeks, she is getting good 8 hour blocks of sleep in at least 4-5 times per week. It's an amazing accomplishment on her part!

A Little Sneak Peak into My Labor & Delivery Experience

2011-09-21T03:06:00.002-04:00

I just watched several videos of my [horrible?] experience going through labor. I decided to pick it apart a little and show you all some of the clips. Don't worry, we did not record anything gross! And we did NOT record any clips of me screaming in pain. If we did there's a good chance I would have ripped the camcorder out of Bill's hands and smashed it into the wall... just sayin'.

Enjoy!

Blairex Boudreaux's Butt Paste

2011-09-19T23:44:00.002-04:00

This is a great product to cure diaper rash fast! Someone at my baby shower gave me a tube of Blairex Boudreaux's Butt Paste and told me it was Miracle Cream! She told me she uses Butt Paste not only for diaper rash, but for baby acne or breakouts anywhere on the skin.

Amelia had a minor case of diaper rash this past week. [Yes, using cloth diapers can cause diaper rash too unfortunately.] It was there for a few days before I realized that was what she had. As a first time mother, I have never seen what diaper rash looked like. Amelia was so fussy! So I dug out the tube of Butt Paste and rubbed some on her bum. By the next diaper change it disappeared! No joke! It was 2-3hrs later. I put more of the cream on her just as a precaution but it was completely gone and Amelia was a much happier baby girl!

PROS

Works fast!
Good value/ price
Helps treat & prevent diaper rash
Protects chafed skin due to diaper rash
Helps seal out wetness
Soothes & heals cuts and scrapes
For people of all ages!

CONS

None. I read somewhere online not to use diaper rash creams with gDiapers because it will cause build up and ruin the cloth's absorbency. However, I haven't had any problems with this.

2 Months of gDiaper Experience

2011-09-19T21:21:00.001-04:00

GDIAPERS ROCK! I am a big fan thus far. Amelia is 10 weeks old yesterday and while I can't say that I've been using gDiapers the whole time, I've definitely been using them over a month and a half. She was born 7lbs3oz so at first they were too small. Then I was visiting my grandma in the hospital for a week. So for all the babysitters, we used disposables since we received some as gifts from the baby showers.

Here is my pros/cons list for using gDiapers. [Besides the normal sustainability reasons!]

PROS

Very easy to use!!
Very easy to launder. I'm on a two/three day schedule with 6 gPants & 24 gCloths & 12 gLiners. I wash them with an eco-friendly detergent and hot water on a regular cycle and rinse. Then I dry all but the liners and wetbags.
Very easy to travel with. I just use the gWetbag, however any wetbag will do to store soiled diapers. I've even used a plastic bag but that's not very sustainable to use every time!
No complaints with leaks. The only time they have leaked is when I forgot to change her after feeding her and she pees "A LOT" and twice or more... [My Bad!]
All the poop stays in the liner for the most part. If it doesn't it's because she created a "Diaper BOMB" and it all went up her back... this happens with disposables too. It's life!
Product is made well with one exception below.
I feel like my baby is trendy with her gDiapers... however I may be biased!

CONS

I pulled a string on one of the gLiners and it unraveled near the orange snap. [I should NOT have pulled the string. Ha..] No complaints with any other liners though.
It takes my dryer two cycles to fully dry the gCloths.
For some reason, other people complain about me using them... why? They are just jealous and wish they could wear gDiapers!

I can say that I am happy we actually committed to these diapers. It is worth the money, especially since we plan to use these diapers for our next baby as well. Amelia will probably outgrow the small size soon and they are in awesome condition. I wish I could afford better gender neutral colors but for now green and orange are what we have.

Her diaper is on backwards!

To my embarrassment, I have shamefully been putting Amelia's gDiapers on backwards. Obviously she is not happy and crying because her diapers are on wrong! OOPS! The embarrassing part is that I JUST NOW REALIZED IT WHILE WRITING THIS BLOG POST... Hmm... Good news is that gDiapers can be worn two ways and successfully hold in all liquids! From now on all diaper photos will look like the first two above! :D

Fussy Baby = No Pictures

2011-09-09T15:36:00.002-04:00

We have attempted to get professional pictures taken at JCPenney twice this week. Apparently Amelia does not want to get her pictures taken. She has been super fussy lately. We were all ready to leave 15 minutes ago and decided to cancel the appointment after too much stress built up. She has been crying and fussing all day it seems. I gave her a bath and surprisingly she was okay with it. Then I started dressing her and she started up again. I knew she was getting hungry so I tried feeding her... She was too upset to nurse efficiently so I ended up pumping her a bottle. Fed her. Burped her. Changed her diaper. And she screamed.. and screamed some more. I can't believe we actually attempted putting her in her car seat... At this point I just grabbed my phone and canceled the appointment. Now she is cuddling up with daddy in the rocking chair, fast asleep.

Man. I tell ya... babies! Ohhh just gotta remind myself. She's probably going through a growth spurt! My poor baby girl. I guess we'll just try to do pictures next week.

:/

Lots of Pretty Smiles

2011-09-06T16:45:00.000-04:00

Well hello again! Life with a baby is definitely tiring and busying but it's much better than before! I just have to show off several pictures of her genuine smiles. She is such a smiley sweetheart now. She laughs and talks too...well coos. Her favorite word/noise is "GOO". It's so precious! I love being a mommy!

The Only Reason it's Okay for Cooler Weather to Come

2011-07-25T18:25:00.000-04:00

Miss Amelia June will get her first dose of college football this fall! She is already excited about it haha-- I just need to buy her a little baby jersey... not sure if they make those in that newborn sizes but she will need something. Maybe just a Michigan State t-shirt or cheerleader outfit.

[I don't want summer to end anytime soon! I'm just saying that I am excited for football season!]

My First 2 Weeks of Breastfeeding

2011-07-25T17:31:00.000-04:00

Mommy & 3 day old Amelia

Let me begin by saying, motherhood would be ten times more enjoyable if I could get at least a five hour stretch of sleep throughout the night... For some reason, I wasn't anticipating the true meaning of sleep deprivation. Amelia is hungry every 2-3 hours for the most part. However, I think she just went through her first official growth spurt because she was hungry every single hour yesterday! Feeding her is getting very tiring. I have to remind myself that her tummy is very small & breast milk digests faster than formula, making her hungry more often.

Overall I don't really mind breastfeeding because it is easier than getting up and making warm bottles every 2-3 hours. As soon as she was born, the doctor handed her to me and I fed her. She latched on perfectly the first try. The first week she ate for 15 minutes on each side. That was good! Now she goes for about 10 minutes on each side or only 15 minutes on one side. I have no clue the amount of milk she is actually getting but I assume it's the right amount because she has gained her birth weight back and is definitely over 8lbs now. She also has plenty of wet & dirty diapers!

I like breastfeeding because I know it's the healthiest choice for Amelia. Like I already mentioned, there is nothing to prepare when she is hungry. If someone is around I just go somewhere private to feed her. Otherwise, I usually spend the entire day in my bra. It's easier. I also like breastfeeding because it is really great bonding time. Sometimes she is just sleepy and falls asleep, but other times she is wide-eyed and staring up at me while she eats. It's precious. <3 It's also nice to know breastfeeding has many health benefits for the both of us, including helping me burn off my leftover 15lbs from pregnancy!

Breastfeeding is not my favorite thing because my boobs are sore! It might be getting better... but I really don't think so. I'm pretty sure that she latches on correctly and it's just my body taking forever to adjust! I use lanolin after every feeding and so far have not had any bleeding/cracking issues. [That just sounds terrible!!!] The worst part is when my boobs are engorged & they're filled to the max with milk. I pump sometimes if Amelia is not hungry but I don't want to increase my milk supply by pumping in between feedings. Sometimes if she waits a good 3-4 hours before getting hungry, I pump an ounce of milk from each side before feeding her. This way she doesn't struggle for so long trying to latch on. It's also less painful for me. [BTW, I use the Medela Swing Breast Pump and it works wonders! I can't image using a hand pump... mainly bc I pump one side while feeding her on the other side... I am getting better at multi-tasking!] In general breastfeeding does not hurt, it's just the initial latching on! Several nurses told me that the pain from this will go away soon. [Still waiting...] Another inconvenience is choosing which clothes are easiest to breastfeed while wearing. I personally think it is harder to find clothes to wear while breastfeeding, compared to my third trimester of pregnancy.

Regardless of the self sacrifices I have to make in order to breastfeed [and take care of my child forever...!] I feel obligated and want to continue breastfeeding. My goal is to breastfeed solely, no formula for at least 3 months. I will do a reassessment at that point. It really depends on whether or not I find a career job that is worth having. I have to like it and make enough money to see if it's worth paying for a babysitter and losing precious childhood moments 40 hours a week.

The Birth Story of Amelia June

2011-07-18T13:39:00.002-04:00

34 HOURS OF LABOR & FINALLY DELIVERY

More pictures soon! <3

I don't know how I ever survived. All that I remember is that I was traumatized and my memories are very distorted due to all the pain and agony... okay so while I don't want to discourage anyone from having a baby, I did not like the whole process. Pregnancy all the way through the third trimester was fine. Great. Dandy. Birthing... holy crap. Even though I will probably do it all over again, don't let me do it anytime soon! Yikes! Okay, enough intro... here's the story.

On the night of July 8, 2011 Bill & I decided to go to bed around 1:00am. My contractions began at 4:30am July 9, 2011. I woke up due to a slight rolling cramping feeling in my stomach. It wasn't unbearable but it was uncomfortable and I couldn't fall back asleep. I was very excited, hoping that I was going to have my baby that day. I timed my contractions the entire time. I was a Time Nazi making sure that they were consistent and that it wasn't a fluke, or Braxton Hicks contractions. My contractions were light and occurred every 5-15 minutes. They started getting more intense around 3:00pm, when they occurred every 4-5 minutes. From 4:30am-3:00pm I walked up and down my stairs, took long walks outdoors, did some prenatal yoga positions to help me dilate [fail], and read a million things online about contractions, labor, and delivery. At about 4:30pm, I went to the emergency room at Metro Hospital because my contractions were hurting a bit more and were consistently every 4-5 minutes for about an hour or two. I went to the OB triage area to get examined and found out my cervix was only dilated to 3cm. [A couple days before, I was dilated to 1.5cm so I guess those contractions were doing something...] I had to stay there another hour to see if my contractions were really making me dilate. An hour later I was still at 3cm. We waited another hour to be sure to find out I was still dilated to 3cm. By this time it was after 6:00pm and my contractions were not feeling good AT ALL. I was at the point where I could no longer walk and had to drop to my knees at every rolling contraction. Painful. My grandma called me randomly after I was out of the hospital and decided to drive down and help me through early labor pains. She is a retired OB nurse so her support was very much needed and comforting.

The doctor's gave me some sort of prescription medicine when they told me to go home. I don't even know what it was supposed to do. It took us an hour plus to find a pharmacy open after 8:00pm on a Saturday. When we eventually got this medicine, it did nothing. I was crying through my contractions from about 7:00pm until I was finally admitted into the hospital around 5am? I lost time during this period. We went home after filling the prescription and I tried to lay down and find some comfort. No luck. I got a cool rag to place over my forehead. Soon my grandma arrived and helped me breathe through some of my contractions. It kinda helped. My preferred method of getting through a contraction was crying and moaning in pain until it was over... It hurt really, really, really bad and it wasn't getting any better. Around 1:00am we decided it was time to go back to the hospital because my contractions were 3-4 minutes apart and PAINFUL. We went back and found out I was only dilated to 4cm. But still, it was progress... :/ We stayed another hour and that hour was the worst. My grandma, Bill & I were outside the triage area praying that my suffering was actually doing something! [making me dilate!!] I was making a lot of noise throughout the hospital hallways. I would cry so hard through each contraction. After a contraction there would be a moment of peace... and then the rolling pain would come again. We called for the nurse and she checked me again.

Thank God I had dilated another cm in that hour and was finally admitted into the hospital. I was at 5cm so they took me to my room and gave me some medications. First, I got my IV and they gave me narcotics. [?] It made me feel drunk, happy, and social. It was a huge relief. Another 20 minutes passed and the anesthetist gave me an epidural. I felt great. This was all happening around 5:00, 6:00, or 7:00am. I have no clue. I think I slept a couple hours at this point and waited to dilate further. The nurses/doctors came in and checked me several times to find out I was not dilating anymore. I ended up having to get Pitocin to help me dilate. Thankfully, I was on pain medication and did not feel the awful results of being rapidly induced. I was dilating very slow the entire time. I think around 1:00pm it was time to push. I was tired but very excited at this point. I was going to meet my baby very soon! I had no clue what I was doing but the nurses and doctors were very helpful, motivating, and super nice. I pushed with a few contractions. I thought everything was going good until I realized that "Ouch... Things are hurting again!" It hurt every time I pushed. I did not like this anymore. My happiness suddenly went away. My epidural must have worn off??? I pushed... cried... moaned... yelled... got angry... hated my life... wanted to die... and finally a healthy baby Amelia June was born at 2:01pm July 10, 2011. I was exhausted and sobbing at this point. They took my baby away, sucked the gunk out of her nose and mouth, and handed her back to me while I breastfed her successfully at the first try.

The moral of this story is this.
***It is physically and emotionally draining to give birth but yes, of course, it is worth it!***
I have a low pain tolerance as it is so it just sucked. It hurt really bad. However, I do think I could have managed everything a little better if I was more rested when everything had started. [And if it wasn't so fricken long!!!!!!!!] I expected my labor to last the average 12 hours... I was definitely wrong. But I am definitely happy with my 8 day old baby girl. I am still in shock that I am officially a mother and that Bill is a father. We look at Amelia, then at each other in amazement. Crazy feeling. Despite all the pain, Life is good.

Oh No! I Can't Find Time to Post!

2011-07-16T14:30:00.001-04:00

My daughter, Amelia was born six days ago on July 10, 2011. She is very healthy and we are doing well. I have many post ideas that I want to write about but finding the time to write has become difficult. In my spare time [anytime she sleeps], I have to make a huge decision on whether I will sleep with her or whether I will clean up around the house and take care of myself. I have not been able to manage time for my hobbies yet, so bear with me. I intend on posting my birth story and an entire post dedicated to her newborn pictures. I also want to write on breastfeeding, sleep deprivation [oh yeah], after-pregnancy emotions, and more... I am feeling energy to write more today. It just depends on whether or not Amelia takes a long nap soon!

My Pregnancy Experience with RAGE

2011-07-06T16:17:00.001-04:00

For the 4th of July, Bill & I decided to watch the fireworks in downtown GR. I was excited for the large crowd and beautiful fireworks display. While overall I had a great time and enjoyed myself, I had several episodes of intense rage that I can only explain by saying PREGNANCY HORMONES.

First off, we arrived a little late around 8:00pm. So we knew that we would have a difficult time finding a place to sit and watch the fireworks. There were tens of thousands of people there. [That's the best number I could find.] I wasn't really concerned with finding the best seat this year. All I wanted was some elephant ears and/or cotton candy! We settled with a large $6 bag of cotton candy. Ha... :/

Anyways, what really upset me were all the obnoxious people that were everywhere! I felt like there were hundreds of greasy teenagers in their own little cliques staring at me in disgust. Some of them would blankly stare at me as if they had never seen a pregnant woman in their life. How rude... They didn't bother me the most though. After we found a spot to sit down by the river, a mother decided to give her little boy a billion snap pops to throw right next to us. Unfortunately I had a slight headache and found these to be incredibly irritating. He was throwing these snap pops next to us, many of them hitting Bill's legs for a good half hour! And the mother kept opening more and more boxes of them... I wanted to strangle her. She could have made the kid throw them a little further away from us... So she triggered some of my rage... I was so mad that I didn't know what to do.

Then later around 10:30pm, the fireworks started and all was fine except the giant tree blocking our view. I really didn't mind the tree... it was fine. But 10 minutes into the show, these guys walked over and stood right in front of us. There were several of us sitting down and they STOOD in front of our view. I wanted to get up and punch them. I have never felt such a strong urge to punch someone and be violent. I cursed a little and ended up standing up. I wanted to hit them with my water bottle too! I was PISSED. Anyways, I ended up doing nothing... and just tried to enjoy the rest of the fireworks display, which I did enjoy.

So there are some of my hormonal issues/breakouts that are definitely due to my pregnancy! I am kinda shocked at how intense my anger had built up. I can't really explain how mad I was... but I was mad. I'm glad I don't normally think so violently.

Anyone Thinking About Getting Pregnant? [Here's my experiences so far.]

2011-07-06T15:24:00.002-04:00

Here is a list of all the pregnancy symptoms I have experienced up to this point in my pregnancy. My intention is NOT to scare you but give you a real example of what you could experience.

38wks2d

Nausia-

First 11 weeks.
When I didn't eat enough or if I ate too much randomly throughout my pregnancy
If I didn't eat enough while taking my prenatal vitamins & iron supplements
Randomly just because (though not often, only a handful of times after 11 weeks)

Vomiting- only once or twice
Soreness of Breasts- only a couple weeks in first trimester
Enlargement of Breasts
Darkening of Areolas
Frequent Urination
Increase in Libido- always a plus for a woman :D
Fatigue-

First Trimester- I took lots of naps.
Third Trimester- Now, I look back at my first trimester as if the fatigue I experienced then was a joke. I am much, much more exhausted now than before. Even when I sleep the whole night, I'm still EXHAUSTED. [That's definitely the right word!]

Food Aversions- I've had more food aversions than cravings. I could not look at meat for the first trimester. I haven't had a big appetite for the majority of my pregnancy.
Strange Cravings-

First 11 weeks I ate a lot of fruit, but I think that was due to nausea and my inability to stomach anything else.
For 2 weeks straight I craved pie. I don't like pie or desserts very much...
Lately, I've been craving ice cream and sweets. Again, I'm not a "sweets" person...

Colostrum from Breasts- Around 5 months, I noticed I was lactating a little bit.
Emotional Mess-

Mood swings most severe in first trimester
Lots of pointless tears & sob sessions
Rage- I have never wanted to hurt strangers/people more! I will tell you my Fourth of July experience next post... :/

Stretch Marks- I didn't notice mine until someone pointed them out. I think I got them towards the end of my second trimester on my sides.
Extra Gas- Embarrassing, but especially in my second trimester I just couldn't hold it in!
Increased Discharge- Started around 35 weeks. Maybe later-- but there's definitely an increase.
Vaginal Pain- Sharp pain "deep within". It's due to the baby settling further down into my pelvis.
Shortness of Breath- This really started up in my third trimester. I'm winded every time I walk up the three staircases to my apartment.
Bleeding Gums- I've noticed my gums bleed more when I brush my teeth.
Backache- My lower back started hurting more & more as I got further into the third trimester
Slower Movements- I can't move as fast as I could before... it's annoying, especially since I've basically been in good shape my whole life.
Difficulty Sleeping-

Insomnia- During my second trimester, I found myself getting only 4-5 hours of sleep or just not being able to sleep more than 8-9 hours. This was definitely abnormal for me because I used to sleep 11-12 hours straight!
Uncomfortable- I just can't find a good sleep position anymore. This really started to be problematic a week ago (at 37 weeks).

Heartburn- Very Minimal... nothing more than the normal few times I've experienced it before being pregnant.
Nasal Congestion- Since the beginning of the third trimester, I've felt like I've had a constant case of the "sniffles".
Weight Gain- I was always paranoid about becoming "puffy" but most of my weight gain is concentrated in my stomach area. I've gained a healthy 35lbs and have leveled off at 162lbs for a good month now.
Swelling- My hands & feet occasionally become swollen. I do yoga poses & drink water, which help control it. This started in my third trimester.
Difficulty Putting Pants On- :D just during this last trimester because of my big belly.
Light Headed & Dizziness- If I bend over & come up too fast, I get light headed. I stand up slower to avoid this.
Shinier Hair- Not always, but my hair looks like it could be in a shampoo commercial :D

I feel like I am missing a bunch of random symptoms. I will update this post as soon as I remember more symptoms or experience more of them.

I have not experienced [knock on wood!] some common symptoms like constipation, hemorrhoids, nose bleeds, blotchy skin, varicose veins, frequent headaches, or excessive hair growth in not-so-nice places.

I am still waiting for my water to break, contractions to come, or even Braxton Hicks contractions [false labor contractions]! I've never before been excited about feeling intense pain... obviously I'm not excited for the intense pain but kinda! It means I will meet my baby girl soon!!

38w2d- I Am Ready!!!

2011-07-06T13:46:00.001-04:00

I don't really have a post topic per say, but I just want to update you all on some more of my pregnancy feelings. Today I am officially 38 weeks, 2 days pregnant. So I am nearing the end of this journey and very soon will officially become a mother. This is still very hard for me to comprehend but I feel that I am as best prepared as I can be for the arrival of our new baby. We have everything [& more!] that she will need. I am mentally prepared to sacrifice and devote all of my time and energy to her. I am learning as best as I can how to breastfeed and just care for her in general. But as real as I am trying to make this be, caring for my daughter is still apart of my imagination. Yes, I feel her moving around in my belly all the time. Yes, I talk & sing to her all the time. Yes, I talk about her all the time. But I still have not held her yet... and I really don't know what to expect when she comes. I can't wait for the moment when it all becomes REAL. This may seem kinda silly but despite my aches & pains from pregnancy, I still have my own time. I don't have someone depending on me 24/7 yet... [like someone to feed, change diapers, hold, comfort, bathe, etc. She is depending on me to be born, yes but you get the point...] SO my point is that I am really excited & wish I would go into labor right now! :D It'd only be 12 days early.

Still can't believe how much time has passed and that I am only 12 days away!!!!!! Ahhhh!! Crazyyy!! :D

Need to look Sexy @37w5d Pregnant? [Bachelorette Party to Attend!]

2011-07-01T14:40:00.000-04:00

Impossible.

Just Kidding! But really, I have tried on everything in my closet and have come up with only a few pieces of clothing that are supposed to make me look sexy. This may be an easy task for someone who regularly buys maternity clothing... but I have only purchased a BeBand & BellaBand to help me continue wearing my jeans. So trying to find my sexy outfits, which are generally too tight to begin with, (without being pregnant!) was challenging.
I decided to skip out on my dresses all together. The only dresses that look and feel great on me are the flowy, more casual styles.
I was going to wear a white skirt but the skirt doesn't zip up all the way and I couldn't find a shirt that would cover the zipper and match the skirt appropriately.
Moving on.
I have a really flashy navy blue sequin cardigan... but I couldn't find anything to wear underneath it besides this super sexy black lace tank that made it impossible to breathe in...

And I tried on more & more until I settled with this outfit. I will call it my Charlotte Russe Outfit because everything besides the undergarments comes from Charlotte Russe. [Even though all of it was bought at Plato's Closet...hehe]

See-Through Purple Sequin Tank

Lace Purple Tank layered beneath [gives me an extra sexy feeling even though you can't really see it!]

Dark Gray Lace Cardigan

Light Gray Dress Shorts [that do NOT zip...]

Large Black Beaded Tear Drop/Hooped Earrings


Don't be fooled.. I'm def 37wks, but this pic is doing a decent job hiding that fact!

My overall opinion? It's not really sexy... I'm trying to be sexy with the sequin top but the shorts make me look too casual. Regardless I have ran out of patience trying to figure out what to wear! For goodness sake, there is a live human baby growing inside me right now! Give me a break... :D

BUT, I still have to figure out what I'm going to do with my hair... It kinda has a nice wavy/curly look today but of course it's down pouring right now and I don't anticipate that it will stop anytime soon. Maybe an updo? Updos are sexy...

Baby Furniture for my Cats? They think so!

2011-06-30T13:15:00.001-04:00

My cousin Jessica just gave us a basically brand new baby bassinet that she used for her twins. It was sitting in a basement for a couple years but I took all the fabric off, washed it, and it's as good as new! Bill and I rearranged our bedroom and organized everything to make it perfect for our baby girl to come home to. The bassinet is placed next to my side of the bed and it's just adorable! The first night sleeping next to it, I just spent the whole night thinking about how we would really be having our own baby sleeping in there. It is still very hard to imagine but I can't wait!

Okay to my point, the funny part of this story! I woke up and looked in the baby bassinet to see my two cats curled up together sleeping in it! IT WAS SO PRECIOUS! Excluding the fact that there is a ton of cat hair on the sheet and I have to rewash it... it was so cute! They have slept in that bassinet every night now, [about 4 days]. My cats seriously think that all the baby stuff we have in our apartment belongs to them. They are SPOILED. They even think the nursery is for them. Annabelle sleeps in the new glider on the Boppy pillow. Raja sleeps on the changing table. For now it's okay but when the baby comes, they will be in for quite a surprise! I think they are going to be jealous!

Annabelle in Glider on Boppy Pillow

Close Up

Raja on Changing Table. Notice my great organization skills! ;)

Close Up

Annabelle was first to discover the new bassinet.

Then Raja joined!

"Oh yeah, it's totally comfy."

This is Me Feeling Miserable. Unpleasant Update @ 37w2d

2011-06-29T17:26:00.001-04:00

I have been nauseous all last night and all day today. I could not sleep at all due to feeling sick to my stomach and my inability to find a comfortable position. I tossed and turned all night long, frequently changing the side I was laying on. I went to the bathroom about four times hoping maybe if I emptied my bladder I would fall asleep. No luck. Bill's alarm clock went off at 7am for work and I shot up and headed straight to the bathroom. I threw up everything I ate yesterday, including the Spicy Chipotle Chicken tacos that were so delicious yesterday. Gross. [Never again, will I eat those...] Then after vomiting, my body decides to have a fun case of diarrhea. Gross. I felt a little better after throwing up and decided to rinse my mouth and lay back in bed. I fell asleep for about two more hours until I had to get up for a doctor's appointment. I have no clue where this sickness came from. I haven't felt this nauseous since my first trimester so I was/am nervous that morning sickness is coming back at 37 weeks... :/

I told my doctor that I felt really sick. She asked me if I was having vomiting and diarrhea. I said yes... and it turns out that this is a normal end of pregnancy symptom. She said that the baby could be moving and kicking at my stomach and causing irregular bowel movements, etc. She said to focus on eating small amounts of healthy food, especially protein every couple hours instead of eating big meals. So far today, I have eaten a half bowl of cream of wheat cereal [absolutely disgusting!], crackers... more crackers, a few grapes, and a nectarine. I've been drinking a lot of water which makes me feel better but I am miserable today. I can't sleep off the pain! Here is what I look like right now. No mean comments. This is me miserable! Ha... :/

Baggy Eyed, No Sleep, Nauseous Version of ME :/

The funny thing is that yesterday I was seriously thinking that I would try and prepare myself to have a natural birth. No Epidural. Funny... I was miserable all through the night and it instantly crashed my motivation. I can't be nauseous AND going through the most intense pain of my life simultaneously. I will reconsider this option when I feel better.

Another update from my doctor's appointment. I am still 1cm dilated, 60% effaced [like last week]. The baby's heart rate is great, however she is measuring 2cm smaller. Apparently last week, she was 1cm smaller. So they ordered an ultrasound because she has been measuring normal every week until week 36. The doctor said that the baby probably has dropped down into the birth canal a little bit [?] but they want to make sure everything is fine with the placenta.

So that's it. I hope this feeling goes away soon or at least gets better!

Update: This morning I feel fine... It must have been a 24 hour stomach flu or something. IDK. But I am happy to feel better again!!

Why I'm Using Cloth Diapers- specifically, the gDiaper

2011-06-26T00:09:00.002-04:00

gCloths (still needing to be washed!) on left & gPants on right

My gDiapers have finally arrived in the mail! After thinking and dreaming about using these hybrid, cloth diapers for over a year now [yes, before I even knew I would be pregnant so soon], I finally get to hold them in my hand!! I never even considered using cloth diapers until I took a Sustainability course at MSU. I did an entire research project on the gDiaper products and fell in love with the idea of using a safer, more earth-friendly product. I plan to write several posts related to my gDiaper experience. I have no doubt that it will be a positive one, but I will be sure to give an accurate account of my experiences, good and bad. Until a few days ago, I've only talked to one other person who uses cloth diapers. Everyone else absolutely despises the idea and complains to me saying I will change my mind... [Seriously people? I am highly dedicated & even more motivated by people who say I will fail. Just a quick FYI.] Anyways, I want to tell you why I am so addicted to these diapers without ever having used them yet.

Cloth Reduces Ecological Footprint
To begin, cloth diapers are much, MUCH more sustainable than disposable diapers. If you don't know anything about disposable diapers know this concept. Disposables produce too much garbage. One child alone can go through up to 8,000 diapers. This produces around 1 ton of garbage per child. In 2004, the United States alone sold between 18-24 billion disposable diapers which all ended up in landfills. Only 18 billion diapers alone use 82,000 tons of plastic a year and 1.3 million tons of wood pulp -- 250,000 trees. It takes one disposable diaper 500 years to decompose! It has been said that diapers are the 3rd largest consumer waste product in our landfills... The statistics go on forever. [I have not forgot about the whole debate on filling up landfills vs laundering energy expenses... but I will not go into much detail. I have a energy efficient washer and plan to use an eco-friendly detergent. I personally believe cloth is STILL better for the environment than disposables.]

So, with that being said, my main driver to using cloth is to reduce my ecological footprint. gDiapers are not created with plastic, which is non-renewable. gRefills [the disposable option of the gDiaper] are 100% biodegradable and take 50-150 days to fully compost. COOL HUH? When I have my own house with a yard and a place to create a compost... that is what I will be doing. Another important reason I plan to use gDiapers is that the company is constantly working towards becoming more and more sustainable. Their focus is to become Cradle to Cradle certified [Good book. Read Cradle to Cradle: Remaking the Way We Make Things]. Currently only their gRefills, the disposable option of gDiapers, are certified. This certification means to take into account all the costs of a product's lifetime. This includes the raw materials needed to create the product, how it affects the consumer, and how it is disposed of and returned back to Earth. It takes into account both human and environmental health concerns.

Cloth is Less Toxic
Disposable diapers are created with harmful chemicals and gels that are needed for the extra absorbency. They contain Dioxin, which is a highly toxic by-product of the bleaching process. Sodium Polyacrylate is the gel that makes the disposable diapers super absorbent. Just an FYI, this gel was banned from being used to create tampons in 1985 due to the increased risk of Toxic Shock Syndrome. I still don't understand why disposable diaper companies are allowed to use this in an essential BABY product. Blows my mind. Also in these diapers there is the biocide, Tributylin, which is used in killing and preventing the growth of bacteria. The World Health Organization ranked this chemical as one of the most toxic substances in consumer products today. CRAZY.

There is a pitfall to using cloth too. If you are using cotton cloth diapers, you have to careful with where and how the cotton was grown. Cotton uses A LOT of pesticides to maintain and you don't want those on your baby. However, this is difficult to overcome because most of our clothing is made with cotton. It's almost a lose-lose situation unless you use only organic cotton, which is a good goal to have. I know gDiapers are made with a combination of cotton and hemp. [I am pretty sure they are organic. Anyone know for sure?] If you don't buy organic hemp, hemp alone does not require many pesticides to grow well.

Cloth is More Comfortable
Cloth diapers are much more comfortable for babies to wear! Don't believe me? How about you wear a disposable diaper for a week straight and let me know how you like the diaper rash and itchy plastic between your legs. Next wear a cloth diaper, or a gDiaper for a week. It's made of cloth... it's softer.

Cheaper- More $$$ For the Fun Things in Life!
While gDiapers are not the cheapest method of cloth diapering, they are definitely more affordable than using disposable diapers. At one point I calculated out all the savings we will have using gDiapers and it's AMAZING. We will save around $1000 in diapering costs for one child. We plan on having 2 children total [though you never know what will happen]. But the awesome thing is that we won't have to buy diapers for our second child because we have already purchased them for the first! So really we are saving between $2500-$3000.

Cloth Helps Potty Train Toddlers Faster
Cloth diapers allow children to potty train faster because the child will be able to feel the wetness and bowel movements better. If they are more aware of their icky diaper, they will become more uncomfortable, which gives them incentive to potty train faster. This may sound a bit cruel but regardless on whether you use cloth or disposable diapers, babies do not like sitting around in a messy diaper... It's gross.

While each child varies in the time it takes to be fully potty trained, cloth diapers can help a child potty train up to 6 months earlier! This factor alone gives me motivation to use cloth diapers! Why volunteer to change diapers for more months than you have to???? Silly parents.

gDiapers are Cute
These diapers are just so fricken' adorable! I plan on having my baby girl wear these with only a little shirt on this summer. No one will ever know she doesn't have bottoms on because it will look like a complete outfit.

I purchased the green and orange gDiapers because they come in a 6-pack, which makes them cheaper and gender neutral [in case our 2nd child is a boy]. But gDiapers come in many different colors and prints if you don't like those colors. I MIGHT end up buying a cute purple one just for the fun of it... but for now I am content with the ones I have and can't wait to use them!

---
Keep checking in for more updates with my gDiaper experience. For now, all I can say is that I really like the idea of them and they seem like a very convenient introduction to cloth diapering. I will post more on this subject once my baby is born and she begins wearing them!

♥ 3 Weeks & 2 Days Until My Due Date! ♥

Luckiest Baby Ever. [to have such a wonderful father]

2011-06-19T16:25:00.000-04:00

Happy Father's Day to my wonderful fiancé who will meet his daughter in approximately one month!

She is going to be one of the luckiest babies ever. She has a father who is not only the nicest and most caring guy ever, but someone who will effortlessly be involved throughout her entire life. She is lucky to have a father who is already sacrificing his time worrying about diaper changes, health and safety, preventing possible cat scratches, family vacations involving her, and more. I have no doubt in mind that she will easily feel her father's love throughout each and every day. I am grateful to bring my daughter into the world with such a loving father and family.

Happy Father's Day to ALL Fathers & Fathers-To-Be!

Ease of Self Consciousness

2011-06-18T22:10:00.000-04:00

Normally I am fairly self-conscious and try my best to look well everyday unless I don't go out in public all day. This means I make my hair presentable, dress nicely, and put on at least some eye liner. But lately, as I've become more and more pregnant I don't care as much about what other people think of me. This is relieving because I can just get up and go out in public without worrying too much about my hair, etc. Maybe it's because I feel so huge already that I can't improve my looks that much anyways??? I don't know but I went out garage saling early this morning with my hair flowing everywhere like crazy [lots of frizz/waves] and it didn't bother me. I went to the beach today and I didn't care too much about my stretch marks & baby belly being present. AND I didn't care about my legs peeling. I am always concerned about the appearance of peeling skin in the summer and my worries never even came this year. Another big thing I usually worry about is my tan lines. I could care less this summer about what my tan lines look like. I was sporting about 5 different tan lines last month... crisscross, halter, normal spaghetti straps, etc. I even had a pair of "white shorts" underneath my bikini bottoms. I didn't care. It could be because I am just too tired too worry about such petty things. Or that I clearly have better things to occupy my mind with like What do I do with my baby girl once she's born... and all the normal first time parent worries. Regardless I do like the easing off of my self-consciousness. It can get pretty cruel sometimes.

My Baby Wipes Idea (Apologies. I'm really excited!)

2011-06-17T22:46:00.001-04:00

I AM 35 WEEKS & 4 DAYS PREGNANT!

Have you ever seen a chicken wearing a diaper? Now you have! :D

I know I haven't even posted on the fact that I will be using cloth diapers but I'm really excited about my idea involving wipes! At one of my baby showers I received a huge box of baby wipes from Costco. There are 900 wipes in the box. Initially, I was planning on using only these cloth wipes that I handmade out of flannel but with the 900 disposables, I have an even better idea! My goal is to make the 900 wipes last throughout my child's entire "Diaper Stage." I will use the disposable wipes for the messy*lots of poop*up the back poop diapers and the cloth wipes for the less messy*little poops*hard poop diapers.

Haha! Isn't POOP a funny word? Poop. Poop. Poop. Poop.... Okay... POOP. POOP. Poops is even funnier. Haha... Okay, I'm done. I really am mature enough to be a mom. I promise!

Anyways, I'm really excited about having disposable and cloth wipes. I'm more excited about using my cloth wipes because in general I like to be good to our Earth & not pollute it more... but cloth wipes are not any less convenient if you are already using cloth diapers! I will wash the cloth wipes with the cloth diapers. Simple.

I am just fascinated by all the new things I get excited about these days. Am I old? I can't be that old. I'm only 22. Oh well, I shouldn't judge myself for being happy! :):) But DAAAANNGG it's a Friday night & I am sitting home rambling on about baby wipes... to wipe up baby poop... Oh dear.

Do Babies Dream in the Womb?

2011-06-14T17:59:00.001-04:00

Someone at work asked me if I knew the answer to this question. Do Babies Dream in the Wombs? My first instinct would be: Yes, babies do dream in the womb. I think this because there is evidence of babies dreaming after birth. Also, newborn puppies and kittens dream. You can tell because they will be sleeping while kicking their paws and squealing at the same time. I just assume that a developing human being would start dreaming in the womb since they do once they are born.

After a little research, I have come to a more definite conclusion. According to the article, Baby's First Dreams from the American Institute of Physics, a 7 month old human fetus spends most of its time asleep. During sleep, they are cycling back and forth through states of rapid-eye movement (REM) and non-REM sleep. Since we know that humans dream during the REM state and that 7 month old fetuses experience REM, I conclude that babies do dream in the womb.

Steve Marshall, a self-help and spiritual writer claims to have personally recalled a couple dreams he experienced while he was in the womb. He was able to remember these dreams through the practice of Rebirthing, a New Age breathing technique. His article is titled Why Do We Dream. I don't know if there is anyone else that claims to remember their dreams, let alone any experience in the womb but I found this very interesting.

The next question to ask is: If babies can dream in the womb, what do they dream about? My guess is that babies dream about sounds they hear and things they feel and see in the womb. A baby is able to follow a flashlight moving across the mother's stomach, which means they can at least see different shades of things. Babies must dream about whatever they are sensing.

After writing my post on pregnancy & dreams, Pregnancy Brings Vivid, Real Like Dreams I'm surprised this question never came to mind. I'm glad someone asked me because I am obsessed with dream research and meaning!

I've Been Showered With Baby Supplies!

2011-06-13T21:25:00.000-04:00

[35 weeks today. Exactly 5 weeks to go!]

Bill and I are so fortunate to have such supportive family and friends. I can't tell you enough how much they love and care to keep connected with our lives. I am not only lucky to have my family but to soon be able to officially join his family. This weekend I was given two baby showers. The first one was held by my mom, grandma, and a long time family friend. The second one was held by all of Bill's aunts. Between the two parties we have collected pretty much everything that we need (and more!) to care for our baby girl. I do have one more baby shower that will be hosted by my step mom and step sister soon. I still need gDiapers, a diaper bag, a couple nursing bras, cushions for my glider, wetbags, a washable laundry pail liner, and a nice baby album. We have a beautiful nursery filled with baby supplies!

I will be writing personal baby product reviews on all our items once we start using everything and have made a concrete opinion on their reliability, etc. Here is a list of everything I received so far, including what we have picked up at garage sales for cheap. [I'm sure I'm missing some things though...]

· Activity Center- Bouncer/Walker

· Baby Books- Chewable & Non-Chewable

· Baby Bowls

· Baby Spoons

· Baby Towels

· Baby Wash Cloths

· Bassinet

· Bibs

· Blankets (Several Hand Crocheted!! Quilted!! Sewn!!)

· Bottles

· Burp Rags (Hand-made!!)

· Changing Table

· Crib

· Crib Bedding- Winnie the Pooh

· Crinkle (Noise Making) Toys

· Disposable Diapers (216) Size 1-2

· Glider

· Hair Accessories

· Health & Grooming Kit

· High Chair

· Infant/Toddler Bath Tub

· Leap Frog Learning Stuffed Dog

· Mirror (to see Infant in Rearview Mirror of car!)

· Mobile

· Monitors

· Musical Pull Toys

· Nursing Pads

· Outfits & Onesies (SO MANY. I have started making totes of them… All sizes!)

· Pacifiers

· Receiving Blankets

· Single Electric Breast Pump

· Sippy Cups

· Stroller & Car Seat Travel System

· Teethers

· Wipes (900!) & Cloth Wipes (I made from flannel material)

All these baby things make everything feel even more real. This is a good thing... but it's making me question myself. I hope I am ready to have a baby. It is kinda scary knowing that in about a month I will have a baby depending on me every second of her life for many, many years! It is nerve-racking... I am hoping my motherly instincts will kick in ASAP when she is born!

Mentally Preparing for Labor

2011-06-09T23:00:00.000-04:00

5 weeks 5 days to go! It would be nice to cut one week off from that count down!!

When I first found out I was pregnant, I never really asked my doctors any questions. I think I was still in shock about being pregnant and also, everything that I wanted to know I found in my baby books and online. But now every time I visit the doctor's office, I go through never-ending lists of questions I feel the need to ask... and re-ask. I'm getting really exciting to meet my daughter. MY DAUGHTER. How strange does that sound!? Crazy!! I will officially have my own family. Mommy, Daddy, & Baby. I've been excitedly asking more and more questions about the process of labor and delivery. I want to know as much as I can before I go into labor...

What are the signs of labor?
What do contractions feel like?
Who do I call to see if it's a good time to go into the hospital for delivery?
When is a good time to go to the hospital?
When will I get an epidural? Do I have to wait until I'm dilated to a certain extent first? When do most women choose to have an epidural?
Why do women have Cesarean sections?
Who exactly will be helping delivery my baby?
How long will I be in the hospital for recovery?
What doctor visits do I have to go to after delivery?
Are their vaccinations my fiancé and I will be recommended to take to prevent the baby from getting any possible sicknesses?

My list goes on and on! All these answers make me more excited but nervous as well. My doctor says that I should wait until my contractions are 5-10 minutes apart before coming into the ER. She says that I can call the OB nurse on call for any questions after hours. If my water breaks, I need to come into the hospital immediately and will most likely be induced to avoid infections since the amniotic sac won't be there to protect against germs. Apparently there is no pressure to wait extra long before I get an epidural. On average, women wait until they are between 3-5cm dilated before getting an epidural but they want me to be as comfortable as possible so I can have it whenever. After reading about epidurals, I'm kinda scared of the idea of having my entire lower body paralyzed. This makes me more motivated to have a natural birth... ha. I probably will not feel this way when my body trying to force a baby out of me... but anyways. C-Sections are necessary when the doctors think the baby will not be able to undergo a normal birthing process for various different reasons. [I made my mom have a C-Section... Wow in a way that means I failed at life... Thank you technology or I may not have been here!] As long as everything goes normal I can expect to stay in the hospital for a minimum of 24 hours and a maximum of 48 hours. I will have a check up 2 and 6 weeks after delivery. Then I will go back to my regular caretaker. [I will have a baby to take to a pediatrician!! Aww.... I'm super excited & giddy I know.]

"Pregnancy is the closest thing to death that a women will ever experience...!"

2011-06-08T21:08:00.001-04:00

Today at work, a group of us were talking about how women go through more stressful life changes compared to men. Women have puberty, pregnancy, and menopause. Men have puberty. This lady is rattling off all her reasons why women have it harder than men when she says, "Pregnancy is the closest thing to death that a woman will ever experience!" I'm sitting in the circle, 34 weeks pregnant, thinking oh god, not another pessimistic view on labor. I'm already beginning to get nervous about the whole baby delivery thing. I don't need anyone telling me their own personal horror stories!! All the women closest to me say I have nothing to worry about. And that it will be fine and it's not as bad as the delivery experiences shown on television.

So just a bit of friendly advice. Don't scare new moms to be. Let them remain in their blissful state of mind until the pain comes... There's no use having women dread something that will end up being beautiful in the end.

My "ER" Story

2011-06-07T20:07:00.000-04:00

Being in my third trimester, I am more worried than usual about my health and safety. I have already gone through an early miscarriage [after six or seven weeks in] which took me over a year to recover from so I am easily panicked when it comes to unusual symptoms, pregnancy related or not. I will start off my ER story with the fact that there is nothing wrong with me other than I am really pregnant, and my baby's just getting big!

The end of last week I had a day where I was having trouble breathing. I had to concentrate on breathing in and out slowly. It actually hurt when I was breathing in. Let me tell you, this was not fun. It was scary as heck! I was out crib hunting with my mom and I kept telling her that it was hard to breathe. She said to lay on my left side (in the passenger seat of the car). I did and it wasn't helping. We continued looking at cribs and ended up purchasing one but when I got home, as thrilled as I was, I couldn't do anything but lay on the floor and try to get a fulfilling breath of air. No luck. My mom suggested I call the doctor's office. I did and I was to be transferred to the ER department so I decided to hang up instead. I didn't think it was that big of a deal, and plus I never called the ER department before. I didn't know what I would say. I felt dumb because I knew I was in my third trimester and that it is supposed to get harder and harder to breathe due to the baby pressing against my diaphragm. After awhile my mom went home. I decided I was just going to go to bed early and hope I was able to breathe smoother the next day. Before I laid down, I called a few people to see if they experienced what I was going through. Some told me they couldn't remember having difficulty breathing in their pregnancy. My sister said she became out of breath easier but couldn't remember having any actual pain accompanied with her breathing. These stories frightened me so I became panicky. I started crying. Being panicky while crying never ever helps ease the difficulty of breathing!

Meanwhile, my right arm begins tingling and goes numb. My arm felt weird all day. It felt like it was dead. This is how I describe the annoying heavy, kinda painful feeling. That scared me because my entire arm has never gone numb before. So my sister-in-law "to be" talked to me on the phone and recommended I call the hospital back to see if I should go in to the ER. She said she would take me if necessary. I called, and of course I was crying out of fear so the nurse said that I needed to call an ambulance right away since my pain was so bad. She assumed my pain was bad because I was crying... I am a baby... Crying does not equal physical pain. I said okay and hanged up. Instead of calling an ambulance, I waited for my sister-in-law to be [haha long title] to pick me up. She came and I had my first experience in the Emergency Room.

First, they began by checking all my vitals [heart rate, blood pressure, whatever else that means]. They stuck a bunch of sticky things all over my body that were hooked to cords... they monitored something. My breathing? Heart rate? [I am not a medical expert by any means. I have no clue what they were doing half the time. I studied social science...] Then they said they needed to give me an IV. I have never had an IV before. This was one of my worst fears for going into actual labor!! I was more afraid of the IV than actually giving birth! I always thought that with an IV, the needle actually stayed inside my arm so I would be able to feel it when I needed to move my arm. Instead it's just a catheter. For some reason, a bendable tube in my vein is a much nicer mental image than a pointed, metal object in my vein. It calms me... slightly. Anyways, when the IV was all set I was wheeled down the hall on my bed [lifetime fantasy fulfilled!]. I was going to have a cat scan to make sure there were no blood clots on my lung. The nurse gave me some medicine with iodine in it that warmed up my entire body. It felt like I peed my pants because it was an instant rush of heat... unexplainable. It took 5 minutes. I was pushed in and out of a round doughnut shaped machine. And then I was pushed back to my room. Thirty minutes later, I found out there was nothing wrong with me and that I could go home.
I was at the hospital for about two hours around 12am that night. They had me hooked to so many cords, I felt like I was in a movie and that something was severely wrong with me. All in all I am still glad to have gone to the hospital because it was comforting to know that nothing was wrong. I still get easily out of breath, [example: winded from walking 3 flights of stairs to my apartment]. But I haven't had as much difficulty with breathing since that day. I wonder if the baby was in some weird position. The doctor never said what the problem was. He said my numb arm was likely due to carpal tunnel syndrome which occurs often in pregnant women. My arm, nor any other limbs have not gone numb either since that day.

What an experience! I would like to have a smoother 6 weeks and leave the real suffering until it's baby delivery time!

34 Weeks. Oh How I've Grown!

2011-06-07T06:51:00.000-04:00

I know many people want to see pictures of me & my baby bump. Well I am finally willing to post a few pictures of my "growth". Unfortunately I didn't think to take better quality pictures of myself during pregnancy until now but here are some pictures I snapped quickly to show off my bump!

5 months

6 months

33 weeks (7 months)

34 weeks at Beach! (7 months)

Baby Cribs from a Fairy Tale

2011-06-04T12:08:00.000-04:00

Finding the perfect crib to fit the theme of the nursery is not only challenging, but mentally draining! I did not know so many different styles of cribs existed. My mom was constantly pressuring me to make sure I'd get my "dream" crib because she wanted me to like it enough to use for my second child too. I was given a $150 budget by my mother-in-law to be so that makes finding a dream crib impossible with all the high prices out there. Regardless I want to show you some of the amazing cribs I found. In my mind the only home these cribs could ever fit in would be those in fairy tales. They are absolutely gorgeous. [Prices begin at $690 and end at $19,995!]

Crazy beautiful crib designs!
After shopping online at Babies"R"Us, IKEA, Walmart, Target, Meijer, Khols, JC Penneys, Craigslist, Ebay, Amazon, and other baby boutiques I did find the perfect one for us. It's simple in design but it is very cute and I love it! We are using Winnie the Pooh bedding but I am going to find a better crib skirt. I want one of those poofy, ruffled ones like in the pictures above.

Lay on Your Belly at the Beach [while pregnant]

2011-05-30T21:39:00.001-04:00

Today was the perfect 85 degree beach day. It was sunny without a single cloud in the sky. I was out walking around in my new bikini sporting my baby bump, big and proud. There's nothing better you can do at 33 weeks pregnant. Of course it's only Memorial Day so the water in Lake Michigan was only 53 degrees... Needless to say I only dipped my toes in the water once but I still got some good sun. I was thinking that laying out in the sun wasn't going to be as fun and relaxing as anticipated because #1 I can't lay on my belly and #2 I can't lay on my back without difficulty breathing! My sister gave me the solution. Dig a hole. We were just joking around with the idea at first until I decided it could really be a good idea. I lifted up the sheet we were laying on and dug a hole big enough to cradle my belly. Then I put the sheet over top of the hole and laid down on my belly with it being in the hole. Pure Genius. I laid comfortably on my stomach for the first time in 5 months. The best part was I could relax in the sun at the same time. If anyone is pregnant during the summer, I highly recommend showing off your baby bump and laying out in the sun at the beach. My only advice is to ignore the stares or smile back politely, put on your sunscreen, and drink lots of water. You'll have an excellent time!

FYI- Soon I will share actual pictures of myself through my pregnancy journey. [in case you were interested]

Wear Your Jeans While Pregnant!

2011-05-29T18:10:00.000-04:00

If you don't feel like getting your own BeBand (maternity band) but still want to wear your jeans, there is an even cheaper solution! Fasten your jeans with a hair tie. This allows you to at least wear your jeans with longer shirts. I used this trick many, many times before using my maternity bands.

Click here to read my original posting on this subject at my Fricken' Fashionable blog.

I'm Anemic. Give me Iron... and Fiber!

2011-05-26T18:29:00.000-04:00

I have never been able to donate blood due to the my low amount of iron. Though I've never been classified as Anemic until my last doctor's appointment. I'm usually labeled with having "borderline anemia". Apparently it is not uncommon for women to become anemic during pregnancy because there is almost a 50% increase in the amount of blood produced, which means the body requires more iron to make more hemoglobin for all the additional blood. Also, you need extra iron for the baby and placenta. [Thank you Babycenter.com]

So with that being said... I am Anemic. This makes me so happy... yeah. Not really. It means I have to take iron supplements along with my prenatal vitamins. Let me tell you how much this blows. A LOT. Let me tell you why...

Both of these pills make me nauseous. When I say nauseous, I mean I have to eat a lot of food with them or else it will be vomited back up within 15-20 minutes. Just ask my fiancé.
Not only do I have to take one iron supplemental pill, but I have to take two a day. Twice the chances I'll have to throw it up.
I have to pay for these pills. I had a breakdown at the Walgreens pharmacy today. To start off, I listed the wrong address because they still had my old address in their system. Not that big of deal. Then she told me that not one of my three insurances covered the cost of these pills. She asked me if I still wanted to get them. [LIKE I HAD A CHOICE]. Obviously I never wanted to get these in the first place. Tears decided to fill my eyes. I said to the lady, "I don't want to get them because they make me nauseous but I don't have a choice so YES, I will pay for them." She starts telling me about fiber... I ask, "How many months supply do I have here?" She says only one month. I did not want to have to come back and buy these pills every single month... And then the tears came rolling down my cheeks. I quickly handed her my credit card and apologized for crying and told her I couldn't help it because I'm pregnant. I cried all the way home. [**MAJOR PREGNANCY EMOTIONAL BREAKDOWN... Guess how much these pills cost? $6.00. Guess how much longer I'll be pregnant. 2 months. So even if I have to take these iron pills for a few months after my pregnancy as well, it is not a big deal... Like I said originally, I had a break-down. And a pointless one at that.]
The doctor recommends eating a lot of fiber because apparently this much extra iron is highly likely to cause constipation. So now I'm paranoid because I'm lucky to have rarely experienced this and don't know what to expect [besides the worst]! So to expand upon my paranoia, I will tell you what I just ate for dinner.

2 slices of whole grain bread (4g of Fiber)
Peanut Butter (2g of Fiber)
Special K- Fruit & Yogurt cereal (6g of Fiber)
TLC Cherry Dark Chocolate Granola Bar [tastes disgusting] (4g of Fiber)

Total Fiber Consumed= 16g of Fiber
Total Fiber recommended= somewhere between 20-35g/day

Anyways, I was a little melodramatic today over this whole "Anemia" issue but there are definitely worse problems to have. I'm hoping that with the increase of iron, I will have at least a little more energy throughout the day. I have been so ridiculously tired these past two weeks. With that being said, I am off to take an evening nap because my eyes are getting droopy. Nighty Night.

Nausia Returns? [At 32 weeks!]

2011-05-25T21:26:00.001-04:00

Pregnancy is not all sunshine, flowers, and rainbows. It has its flaws...

I felt nauseous for the first 11 weeks of my pregnancy. I remember being so paranoid that I was going to feel sick and queasy for the entire pregnancy. I heard horror stories from friends and family of them being nauseous/puking to the extreme throughout their entire pregnancy. So I was relieved that the terrible symptoms went away right before my first trimester ended. After that I only became nauseous when I didn't eat enough throughout the day. For example, if I ate breakfast at 8am and waited until 1pm to eat lunch, I would feel sick until I put some food in my stomach. I'd have to have small snacks throughout the day to prevent nausea. And it worked.

But now guess what's back to haunt me at 32 weeks pregnant? Incurable nausea from the first trimester. I rarely threw up [only once or twice] but I felt nauseous 24/7 and nothing would cure it. For the past week I have felt sick before and after I eat. I don't have any special tricks to make me feel better either. Today I was officially nauseous all day long. I work in silence sitting at a computer... so feeling like I'm about to throw up all day does not help my concentration... and it makes work last even longer.

I'm assuming this is normal... FML.

Pregnancy Brings Vivid, Real Like Dreams

2011-05-23T21:20:00.000-04:00

I am really big into learning and discovering the meaning behind dreams. Since I was little, I have gone through many intense stages where I would record my dreams everyday. I found out the more that I wrote down my dreams, the more details I would remember and the more intense my dreams would become. Before I found out I was pregnant (and currently) I was not recording my dreams. I remember my dreams almost every night regardless but they have gotten pretty vivid without me trying. The ones that relate to pregnancy started out simple and have grown to become long, emotional, and intense!

Some dream examples...

I give birth to a baby girl.

I give birth to a 8lb baby boy.

I give birth to twins and in my dream they are already toddlers.

I have my newborn baby. I'm taking care of her. I get to feed her, change her diaper, cuddle up with her, rock her to sleep, etc. [Then I wake up REALLY depressed because she's not actually here with me yet. This dream has already happened at least 3-4 times.]

I am determined to breastfeed. Both the baby and I are successfully making this possible. I wake up several times during the night to feed her. Even though I'm tired, I feel SO relieved.

I am determined to breastfeed. Everything starts out well. I feel like breastfeeding is easy and I regret all the time I spent worrying about it. Then all of a sudden it's not working anymore. There is no more milk being produced. THE CATS DRANK ME DRY! There's no more milk for the baby. I am devastated. [Don't ask.. It was a weird dream!]

I am so scared because I am waiting for contractions to come. I don't know what they feel like. All I know is they are supposed to hurt really bad. I try following my daily routine but I can't help but feel nervous. All of a sudden I feel a sharp pain. Oh No! Here they come! It hurts. Oh No! I'm have to go to the delivery room. Now.

What do contractions feel like? I'm really scared. [moments go by...] I just had my baby and the delivery was a breeze. I just can't wait until I get to go home with my baby. I'm learning to breastfeed my baby with the help of a nurse. My stomach is perfectly normal again. It's flat and I have my beautiful body back!

Now you know what my daily fears and thoughts are... ! These dreams clearly portray my emotions and often leave me unsettled for a few hours into the morning. Besides pregnancy related dreams, I also have dreams that bring up unwanted memories from the past. Not cool. I have scary dreams. Two nights ago I dreamed of evil suicidal ducks [sometimes they were dogs] and they were laughing at me while banging their heads against the wall trying to kill themselves... CREEPY as F*CK. I was sobbing in my dream and I woke myself up in the middle of the night because I was whimpering...

My sister Shantori had a really messed up dream/hallucination while she was pregnant. I can't remember the details exactly but let me just say that she truly believed there were bugs all over the ceiling and walls in her house. She made her fiancé get up out of bed to turn the lights on...

Moving on.

I have no scientific evidence but I believe that your dream experiences during pregnancy are definitely heightened. Maybe this is due to the increasing hormones. Maybe this is just due to your natural fears and anxieties about having a baby. I'm not quite sure but it makes for a good story, or at least for funny memories for yourself!

Have a Baby, Plan a Wedding, and Start a Career at the Same Time

2011-05-22T11:14:00.001-04:00

I am going through a huge transition in my life right now. I'm basically trying to have a baby, get married, and start my career all at the same time. Sound impossible? Well the good thing is that I am highly motivated by not failing so I'm bound to succeed. However, it does take a lot of focus and the occasional stress outbreaks to manage it all. I probably won't do everything the way I would if each of these big life events were done one at a time, but that's how life goes. There is so much I want to do that I don't have any time [to waste]. It's impossible to have everything go as planned anyways, so I'll just do my best, hope for the best, and enjoy the results.

How I am beginning to organize these events?

Prioritize. This right here is the only answer.

I am working a full time job at Measurement Incorporated and a part time job at Plato's Closet for as long as I am able. [Meaning until 39-40 weeks and I'm rushed to the delivery room!] My fiancé has high career goals which he is so close to achieving the first step of to becoming a dispatcher for a police department. [Please, Please! Wish him luck! He is down to 1 of 18 people (originally 270) in the race to fill 10 positions!]. Right now he is working as a full time janitor in a factory. [Not too shabby for pay.] So when our baby arrives we will at least be able to cover our finances.

Meanwhile, we are slowly but surely creating our wedding budget and looking for the most affordable ways to have a big [about 150 guests] and beautiful wedding. I am also doing a lot of networking in order to find great ceremony and reception halls, caterers, photographers, etc. The more people you know, the more information you have access to. For example, I am hoping to hire a high school friend as our wedding photographer. She is offering us a great discount and even though she has just started her business, she has already achieved professional [enough] artwork. We are only at the beginning of our wedding planning but it is not something we can figure out in one day. We are focusing on the largest expenses first and with our other time we are preparing for essential baby expenses [and learning how to care for a baby!]. So along with our wedding budget, we also have a baby budget. This budget is a little different than the wedding budget because we will just be saving money until we find out the remaining items we have to purchase after we have the baby showers. Obviously, we hope to receive a lot of essential baby stuff at the showers but we won't know for another few weeks. We are intense "garage-salers" so we have already found some used items in great condition for a great price.

Okay so I briefly covered wedding and baby expenses. The excitement of both events really helps me to become motivated for all the hard work and planning efforts. As for planning my career goals... this is much more difficult to concentrate upon. I used to [still kind of do] have high, ambitious career goals like becoming a Foreign Service Officer which I feel to be the second hardest job to obtain, next to becoming US President [but yeah...]. Since I majored in such a broad topic area, [international studies and religion] I have more options to consider. Now what these options are exactly... I will get back to you! I am thankful to have a fiancé to help support our family while I have a baby and get my life re-organized. In the meanwhile, I will continue doing random jobs to save money and pay the bills. I would love to get a master's degree that will help narrow down my concentration and expertise so I maybe [just maybe] might actually get a worthy job. [Worthy= Decent pay + Something I feel is actually important enough to invest so much of my time into]

I know there will be many challenges to come in order to settle down but the real key [besides prioritizing] is to stay optimistic and positive. I don't force myself to think about these events every single moment of every day. If I am overwhelmed, I do something else. It's that simple.

My 5 Reasons for Choosing Our Baby's Name

2011-05-21T22:08:00.002-04:00

I have good news! We have officially decided what the name of our baby girl will be. Unfortunately for everyone reading, I will not be announcing her name until she is born. This way I am preventing myself from hearing any comments that will flare up my pregnancy hormones and cause me to feel mad, sad, bitter, annoyed, etc! We like our name and do not want to be influenced in any direction, for or against our name choice. However, I will share with you how we decided upon the name. Some reasons may be silly or simple but here is my list.

1. It sounds pretty.
2. It looks pretty written out. [There are no abnormal/funky/ridiculous spellings that will confuse everyone!]
2. The full name "flows" and creates a nice rhythm.
3. It's unique enough but nothing crazy or new. [Like Moroccan or Nevaeh]
4. My fiancé likes the name even more than I do. [This is great because it is nice to see him have such a strong opinion on something for once. And it's just so precious... a daddy talking about his baby girl. *Tear* ♥]
5. We like the sound of all three of our names listed off together. [A real family!]

Basically, we just like the name.

People often name their children one thing or the other for several specific reasons, whether it be a traditional family name, a unique name, a Bible name, or the #1 trending name. Regardless of the reason, I think it is important that the parents genuinely like the name and that they take precautions for future possible insults. By this I mean, if your last name is "Slut" or "Dipshit" please do not name your child "Imma". That's rude and can emotionally wreck your child's life. Thanks.

Feel free to share your reasons for choosing your child's name. You can even list names you completely despise. The comments only bother me if you are directly telling me that you hate our name choice in person, [after knowing that's what we already decided on]! But you don't know and therefore there's no harm that can be done.

BeBands & BellaBands

2011-05-20T19:42:00.000-04:00

These are maternity bands that you wear over your too-tight-unbuttoned-regular or too-loose-maternity jeans/shorts/skirts. You layer them so it looks like you are wearing a tank top underneath your shirt and they hold up your jeans.

BellaBand

BeBand

Thoughts Before the Purchase: I had never heard of maternity bands until I went to a garage sale. The lady was selling a lot of used baby and maternity clothes. I asked her if she had any stretch pants because I was having trouble fitting into my jeans, skirts, shorts, etc. She asked me if I had any maternity bands and tried to explain what they were to me. I had never heard of such thing. She ran inside and grabbed a pair she didn't think to put in the sale and gave it me. At the time I was wearing a longer shirt over an unbuttoned skirt so I was really excited about ending this problem. I've had to be careful not to lift up my shirt, exposing myself/my underwear, and taking away my dignity so I gladly bought them!

Pros [after use]:

Very comfortable

Available in neutral colors [white, black, beige, etc] to easily coordinate with shirts

Retains elasticity and doesn't stretch out or become too loose

Doesn't ride up and expose you
Hides belly button if you pull it up over it! [I love it when it isn't protruding so far out... I don't like hearing daily comments on how people can see my belly button!]

I'm about 32 weeks pregnant and I can still wear my regular jeans with these! Just purchasing one or two of these bands is a money saver itself because I don't plan on buying any maternity bottoms.

I vote this to be the Best Maternity Accessory ever!

Cons [after use]:

None, except for the general problem of trying to maintain balance while slipping one foot into the band and then the next foot without falling over! [This is the same issue I have when putting on pants, jeans, skirts, underwear...my baby bump gets in the way!]

*I have not noticed any difference in practicality between BeBands and BellaBands. I own one of each. You can see in the chart that there are a few differences between the two brands though.

BeBand	BellaBand
Cheaper, $16.99 at Target	More Expensive, $26.99 at babyuniverse.com
Thinner Material [72% Nylon, 21% Spandex]	Thicker Material [84% Nylon, 16% Spandez]
Regular Style	Regular Style & Lace Trimmed

Baby Responses to Mysterious World Outside Womb

2011-05-18T22:06:00.000-04:00

Never before have I felt that the baby inside me was indeed human with emotion! She has begun responding to noises outside the womb. Even though we have all been there before (like we remember ha), just take a moment to imagine what it must be like for a developing baby... To begin hearing strange sounds and not knowing where they're coming from, experiencing being startled or frightened, feeling things press against you through your surrounding wall, and feeling different temperatures for the first time. It's truly unimaginable.

I wanted to write on this subject because I felt like I honestly interacted with my baby for the first time today. I work at a desk grading essays in silence so I pretty much feel every movement my baby makes. Today, to ease the boredom of work I decided to experiment with my baby. Whenever she kicked, I would gently push down on the bump she created on my belly. It was was really funny because right when I pushed down on it (her foot specifically), she moved to a different spot. We did this for a good hour. I couldn't help but laugh sometimes because it was just so precious and some of the movements were so strong, it tickled! It was like I was really playing a game with her! ♥ Hopefully she enjoyed the interaction... I guess it is always possible she was trying to adjust and get comfortable for an hour!

That is my favorite response from her because it's so personal and touching, but there are other times when she is responding to the outside environment. She moves around when I turn on the vacuum, listen to music (especially when I play a cover of Don't You Wanna Stay by Julia Sheer & Jake Coco), and when there's loud noises. She is also sensitive to the extra heat of my computer when it's laying on my belly. One time I had my computer half way on my belly and after an hour I moved the computer to find a deformed belly! I tried to take a picture of it but failed miserably. My baby had moved to the other side of my belly because it was too warm for her on that side! My poor little baby! :/ Moments like these really make me believe that my baby is a real human being. Sometimes I forget she is real because I get caught up in the imagining and planning part of having a baby.

I would genuinely be interested in hearing any personal stories of your babies responses to the world outside their womb. It would be really neat to compare others' experiences to mine. So please, don't be shy and leave a comment if you can relate!

"Just Wait Until...!" [Experienced Moms Trying To Scare New Preggos]

2011-05-16T20:41:00.001-04:00

Almost everyday at least one person I know (or don't know for that matter) comes up and talks to me about my pregnancy. It's now definitely obvious that I am pregnant with my thirty pound weight increase particularly in my stomach area. People begin with either "Ohh how far along are you?" or "So do you know if it's a boy or girl yet?" No biggie. I don't mind repeating the same thing over and over everyday. (Really, I don't mind!) The part when I become unsure about the conversation is when they continue with "Just wait until..." Just wait until what? I get even fatter? Feel more like a cow? Want to die or simply regret this pregnancy bliss during labor?? Please indulge me.

This has been going on since day one of telling the world that I am soon to birth a child. I'm not sure if "once-pregnant, current-moms" are trying to scare me and make me feel bad or if they are genuinely trying to be friendly by preparing me for the worst. I'm CoNFuSed!

Now, so far everything is going okay but...
Yes, it's getting more and more difficult to breathe. Sometimes I stop what I am doing just to concentrate on breathing so I don't have a panic attack!
Yes, I have to go to the bathroom every twenty minutes, sometimes every five.
Yes, I have gained weight I never thought I could.
Yes, it's getting harder to bend over and I fatigue easily.
Yes, I am losing money because I have to buy essentials for a baby. And you're probably right, having a girl will empty my pockets faster.
Yes, yes, yes.

But at 31 weeks...
I am still waiting for the summer heat and humidity to bother me worse than it did before.
I am still waiting for extreme foot pains and swelling to the point of not being able to walk.
I am still waiting for the back aches and sciatic nerve pain to put me on bed rest.
I am still waiting to wobble everywhere I go instead of walk.
I am still waiting for the cute baby tosses, turns, and kicks to hurt so badly, actually breaking my ribs.
I am still waiting for the miserable weeks of not being able to sleep at night. (Doesn't this come after the baby's born?)
I am still waiting for the worst pain I'll ever feel in my whole life during delivery.
I am still waiting for the doctors to stab my spine with a huge needle and insert an IV in my arm.
(Don't even get me started on the "I am still waiting for my child to do this" list)
Please! Can the time come any sooner? I'M STILL WAITING! What is the point of all this fear and hatred being cast towards me, a very happy, first time pregnant, young woman? Can't a girl face pregnancy in peace? Is it because I am in my early twenties? Am I too young to be pregnant? Should I regret this choice I have made? The negative side-effects of pregnancy do not have to be reinforced daily. Every pregnancy experience is supposed to be different. So if you find yourself rambling off all your daunting experiences you hated during pregnancy, just save them for someone who specifically asks for this harassment. Don't frighten inexperienced pregnant women. That's just mean. I'm sure my time will come. After all, I still have nine more weeks to go. Once I am holding my baby girl, I will do a follow up post stating whether or not these just-wait-untils actually happened.

10 Things I Hate About Pregnancy

2011-05-13T22:53:00.001-04:00

Pregnancy is truly a beautiful time in life. Your body is creating a new life and that in itself is so amazing and wonderful. As children, we never realized our bodies full potential. But let's face it. There are definitely uncomfortable changes we have to adjust to during our pregnancy. Here's a list of my 10 least favorite things about pregnancy.

1. My Emotional Rollercoaster: I am an emotional girl as it is. Now that I'm pregnant I have day long episodes where I feel extremely angry over something as small as a misplaced item lying in the living room floor. I may be upset for no reason at all. I may feel annoyed and miserable all day long! It's terrible. Though, I have only had about a week worth of these days throughout my entire pregnancy, I do have smaller episodes of anger outbursts too. I have several moments where I could cry at the smallest hint of emotion floating through the air. There could be anything from a really cute baby in the grocery store, a sleeping cat in a window, a pretty nature setting, a romantic song on the radio, someone yelling at me, a bug getting squished, a flower dying, or something meaningless breaking and my eyes instantly flood with tears. I become an emotional wreck! The worst part is that I never know when these emotions will flare up.

2. Nausea: Now granted that I was pretty lucky during my first trimester and rarely threw up, I did feel nauseous 24/7 for a long 11 weeks. I could hardly eat my meals. I had to skip taking those large, horse-pill, prenatal vitamins in fear I'd throw them up. I did my best to force them down at least every other day. The main thing I was able to stomach was fruit and a little water. Otherwise I just felt miserable.... Now (at 30wks) the only time I feel nauseous is when I go too long without eating. I have to eat something at least every 5 hours or else I will feel sick. I usually only feel nauseous when I eat a early lunch and then make dinner at the normal time (around 6pm) or if I stay up too late and forget to eat a late snack. Regardless how much I suffer with this, I know my experience is much, much better than what I could have ended up experiencing with nausea.

3. Increased Bathroom Frequency: I hate the feeling of having to go to the bathroom... especially when I go to the bathroom and I STILL HAVE TO GO! Sometimes, (like right now!) it's a never-ending feeling of "Oh my gosh! I have to go to the bathroom so bad!" There is no end. It is amusing for people around me... so I suppose I'm happy to entertain... :/ Haha

4. No Alcohol: It is no fun hanging out with friends who are drinking. I really enjoy drinking (moderately of course :) ). And I enjoy the occasional nights that consist of cards & beer with friends. I don't like hanging out with a large group of people, usually single... who are drinking and pointing and laughing at me because I can't drink with them. I think what bothers me most is the fact that I can't drink. Though this is annoying, it is definitely worth the sacrifice.

5. Reduction of Fun Activities: The majority of my pregnancy has been during winter. I like ice skating, sledding, skiing, cross-country skiing, etc. I avoided those activities because they were not things I do all the time to begin with and because there's a large risk of falling and crashing into something. So I didn't enjoy winter activities to the fullest this past season. Now that the summer is coming I will have to avoid amusement parks and tubing & skiing behind a boat. Again, these things are definitely worth the sacrifice. A positive side to this is that I freed up time to discover many more activities that I like to do.

6. Weight Gain: Let's just say that I don't like looking at the scale anymore! Oh Boy!! I never knew I could gain so much weight. So far I have gained 30lbs... and I still have another 10 weeks! Yikes! For a girl, this is just not fair. However, my doctor has told me (numerous times) that it is normal for someone of my body weight (I normally weigh 125lbs) to gain as little as 25lbs up to 40lbs. It's just weird for me because I haven't gained weight for over 7 years now. Weight gain=Healthy baby! But it still sucks! As my body gets bigger and bigger, my clothes get smaller and smaller. I still haven't bought maternity clothes and I don't plan on it. I just wear dresses with athletic shorts, leggings, longer shirts, jeans with a BeBand and anything I can comfortably squeeze into! My selection of clothes seems to get smaller and smaller everyday... and I don't like it!

7. No Intense Workouts: I enjoy working out, lifting weights, and running or biking... the whole nine yards! I don't exercise year round like I should but when I do, I like going all out. So when I found out I was pregnant, of course I hadn't been working out for a few months. The doctors say you aren't suppose to do heavy workouts unless you were doing them before. So I've been enjoying prenatal yoga workouts instead. These workouts make my body feel so relaxed and stretched out, relieving any minor back pain. But I can't wait to start really working out again.

8. Bending Over is Difficult: I never knew how hard it could be to bend over and pick something up off the floor. My belly just gets in the way and it feels weird. Whenever I can I ask Mr. Fiancé to help me!

9. Guilt for not Eating Healthy: I feel much more guilty not eating healthy when I'm pregnant than when I'm not pregnant. I do my best to eat healthy dinners (meat, vegetables, milk) but now that my finacé works second shift, I don't really want to cook an entire meal for myself. It's too much work not to enjoy it with someone else. So I slack off and make something fast like Macaroni & Cheese, Spaghetti, Ramen Noodles, sometimes a salad... my typical meals throughout college. :/ Not cool.

10. Secondhand Smoke: As if this didn't already irritate enough before... DON'T SMOKE AROUND PREGNANT WOMEN! It angers me so much that someone could be that selfish to force a baby to inhale that nasty smoke too. That's all I have to say about this one.

Any other things you ladies dislike about pregnancy? Come on, I'm 100% sure there are more complaints out there! Let's hear them!

10 Things I Love About Pregnancy

2011-05-13T22:53:00.000-04:00

Hopefully you all knew this post was coming after the 10 Things I Hate About Pregnancy post! I do very much enjoy being pregnant despite all the setbacks and unfamiliar body changes that come with pregnancy. Here is my list of the top 10 reasons I love being pregnant.

1. Fetal Movements: I was so impatient to start feeling my baby move, I could hardly handle it! But great things are definitely worth the extra wait. I now feel my baby girl move all throughout the day and sometimes night. By move I mean kick, punch, toss, turn, flip, wiggle, who knows what those babies do in there! It is the most miraculous thing in the whole world because it really let's me know that I am growing another human being within me. It is really weird to know that when I feel like a knee is jabbing into my side from within that there's a good chance that that is really the case!

2. Hearing Baby's Heartbeat: Hearing this new heartbeat coming from within my belly was surprising. The first time I heard it, I didn't know what to think. I thought it was really neat and touching because my eyes started tearing up, but it didn't feel real to me until later on once the fetal movements began. It is definitely reassuring though having the chance to hear her heartbeat every other week now at the doctor's office. It's a very comforting thing to hear throughout pregnancy letting me know everything is alright.

3. Starting My Own Family: My fiancé, Bill and I now have a lot of new thing to talk about for hours on end. I love the fact that we will be starting our own family. It's strange to think that someone will be calling me Mom so soon. Honestly, I can't imagine it. But I love all my new thoughts and curiosities about how my new chapter in life will unravel.

4. Decorating Nursery: This part is so much fun! We have a second bedroom for a nursery and we're going to make it look really cute. I wish I could devote my time to every room in my apartment but I will just save that for the future. We will be painting the nursery walls, putting up curtains, hanging pictures, and setting up the furniture to make it a cozy place for a baby. I realize that babies probably don't care what their room looks like but it will be pretty regardless! I suppose I am beginning to do what they call nesting.

5. Extra Attention: I will always have a friend no matter where I go. When I go to the grocery store, clothes shopping, baby shopping, to the park, out for a walk, a stranger or two will always come up and talk to me. They ask if I'm expecting a boy or a girl, how far along I am, and sometimes even give me advice on what to buy and what not to buy for the baby. It's a weird thing because people don't normally talk to me while I'm looking for the best deals on toilet paper at Walmart... Haha. But really, I like how friendly people are towards pregnant women.

6. No Cat Litter!: My wonderful, amazing fiancé has the opportunity to learn to clean the cat litter in a timely fashion for 9 months plus extra time spent breastfeeding! I absolutely love how the doctor recommends that someone else do it. I have two cats that I love so much and I'm really glad I don't have to deal with their litter for awhile. It gets annoying, not to mention the terrible stench. Maybe I will breastfeed forever! HAHA, just kidding.

7. I Take Better Care of Myself: I am much more cautious now. I pamper myself more and take better care of my health because there's a baby growing inside of me. I want to make sure I'm doing the best that I can for my baby so it's a win-win situation. The baby benefits while I benefit by trying to eat healthier, stay hydrated, and exercise frequently.

8. Baby Shopping: I love looking through baby clothes at garage sales and department stores. It is so much fun to see all those little tiny outfits, onesies, socks, shoes, hats, etc. I like looking at different cribs, car seats, high chairs, all the baby stuff! If I don't look at the price of everything, it's fun imaging actually using all of the new baby items!

9. No Alcohol: Now I know I put this on my list of the 10 Things I Hate About Pregnancy but honestly, after 4 years of college my liver could use a break! I feel healthier not drinking so much. When I'm bored, instead of planning on drinking with friends I've discovered new activities to do. For instance, every Sunday evening we eat dinner and play games like Scattergories, Euchre, Skip-Bo, and Boggle with another couple we're friends with. It's a good time!

10. Daddy Talks to his Baby: The most precious thing ever is when Bill talks to my belly and feels her kick or move around. It's so cute and makes the whole family idea more and more real. He also kisses my belly and says "goodnight baby". How adorable! [If he only knew what I write on my blog... haha!]

Fricken' Fashionable: BeBands to keep your Fashion during Pregnancy

2011-05-10T23:20:00.000-04:00

Fricken' Fashionable: BeBands to keep your Fashion during Pregnancy: "I was out looking for clothes at garage sales this weekend and I came across something very helpful for pregnant ladies who do not want to b..."